Apologies, this is a long one

I (30f) had been best friends with, let's call her Prue, for over 10 years. We had a rocky but firey friendship and there were periods of time where we didn't talk. However, when those periods passed, we'd always link up again and immediately be bffs.

Around 7 years ago, Prue started dating this guy, we'll call him James. Right away, we did not get along.

Over the years, we became more cordial with each other and I forced myself to see the best in him despite the constant jabs he made at me. It was sort of their way (him, his family, their friends etc) but I don't find humor in punching down so I'd usually bite my tongue. What bothered me the most was the way he'd 💩 talk about my friend/his girlfriend the minute she left the room. (Yes I told her but she'd make excuses for him)

I am agoraphobic. COVID made it so easy to not get better. I've been in therapy for 8 years and done a lot of work to get over my PTSD, it's been a really uphill battle with that rock. I spent months working so hard specifically so I could be there for her. Despite my issues, I constantly reached out to her to make plans, or talk, but she was always busy or broke (even when I offered to pay).

Sorry for all the context but here goes the AITA part (all this happened a month before the wedding so plenty of notice was given)

We go to her Bachelorette party and I'm excited to see her even though I'm nearly vibrating with anxiety at the thought of being with a bunch of people idk. I showed up on time, with personalized gift bags for each person that was there, and some delicious 🌳 cookies.

Then I find out it's a joint Bachelors/ Bachelorette party and I immediately see red flags (why doesn't he want her to have her own thing when he was out the nights before on his own thing?) but it wasn't my clowns or circus.

We're all vibing, I'm mostly playing on my phone trying to avoid awkward convos, but engaging in games and conversation with the girls.

At one point James makes a racist joke directed at his cousin and I slip and say "I don't get why that's funny."

It was like he'd been waiting for the moment the whole trip. From then on he berated me, cursed me out, made fun of my mental health, and told me I needed to "get over" the abuse I'd faced as it had been long enough. The final straw was when I was outside by myself getting air and he came out to play "do you know why I hate you?" with me. He started saying all these half true things I quickly realized were second hand complaints Prue must've vented to him. I'm never available (even though I constantly hit her up), I was unreliable (even though I broke my foot), and I was a bad friend. At that moment I decided I really had enough. I kept quiet the rest of the trip, mostly dissociated tbh, and then bailed out first opportunity

When I got home, I packed the special made cookie cutter (It had a print with their wedding info), the personalized fans, personalized pens, personalized bubbles, wedding gifts, and accessories I had purchased for the wedding (despite being told I was worthless due to my lack of contribution) and I mailed it to them with a card saying I thought it was best to part ways. I didn't want to be involved, and having photos of me on their big day and then me bailing out of their lives seemed like the worse option

Friends were split on my choice, despite most understanding my decision.

TLDR: I backed out of a wedding after the groom made it clear that he hated me and his bride had a number of issues with me she never told me about...but our friends are split saying I shouldve followed through.