I (26M) was with my ex-fiancée (27F) for almost 4 years and we got engaged in September. This isn't where I'd thought we'd be less than a year later but some major problems arose and I couldn't get past one in particular.

I have a younger brother (20M) and he's my only family. Our parents are crappy. They hate him because he's gay and while they loved me at first. I stood up to them when they were abusing my brother and they eventually got tired of trying to be proud of part of me and they basically never went home. So I looked out for my brother and even when I did eventually move out, I made sure to stay close so I could see my brother every day and I saved and saved so I could afford a place for us which eventually happened.

He was living with me when I started dating my ex-fiancée and I was upfront about the fact I would always be there for my brother and if he needed me I would drop everything and go to him. I told her I understood if that was a dealbreaker for her. But I said I would not change my relationship with my brother for anyone. She told me she accepted it and I really thought she accepted him and liked him too. He moved out a few months back but we still saw each other almost daily.

At the start of March he went to see some friends and got into an accident. When I got the call I rushed to be with him. I texted my ex-fiancée a heads up as I was leaving. She didn't call or text back and when we did talk again it was over a day later. She sounded off and didn't even ask how my brother was. She acted like she wanted off the phone immediately to be honest. I asked if she was okay and she said she was fine but busy. My brother was in the hospital for three days and I waited with him, which I communicated with her a couple of times, and then I made sure he got to his place okay and had stuff he needed.

She was clearly pissed when I got home but she wouldn't talk about it and when I brought it up she brushed me off. I told her we needed to talk after more than a day like that. She tried to brush me off again but I told her if she wasn't going to communicate at all then I wasn't sure why we were engaged because she clearly wasn't fine and she was clearly pissed. She unleased all this anger and resentment that I'd do that for my brother, or for anyone. She made it clear she wasn't okay with me being so close and protective of my brother. She had a problem with him living with me for so long, with us hanging out still, with how I was his emergency contact and the one responsible if something happened (like it just had). She wanted me to be able to go weeks without seeing or speaking to him. But she also revealed that she had an issue with me being willing to drop everything for anyone other than her. She expressed that she wanted to be the only important person until we have kids.

For me the biggest issue was her problems with my brother's and my relationship. That was something I communicated clearly and it was obvious to me she expected us to be as good as strangers or distant friends who had little to do with each other anymore. I told her we could not work like this and I wasn't going to drop my brother for her. And I called the engagement and our relationship off.

Ever since the breakup she has called me an asshole for not fighting for us and being willing to compromise and sacrifice to make us work. She said my brother does not need to be a big priority for me anymore and she even had some mutual friends tell me I was wrong to break up for that reason. They said it made her feel like she never stood a chance.

AITA?