Hi Reddit, I (22F) need some advice and maybe some perspective. My best friend Ariel (22F) and her boyfriend Dave (28M) have been together for almost two years, and I just can’t do it anymore. Dave is, in my opinion, incredibly toxic, and I’ve hit a breaking point.

From the beginning, I had weird vibes. Ariel told me she had started talking to this new guy, and within THREE weeks he had moved into her place—along with his cat and toddler daughter. Ariel has always been the kind of person who values her alone time and personal space, so it was really out of character for her to jump into living together so quickly.

Then Dave lost his job, and Ariel started paying for everything—his phone bill, car insurance, groceries, even diapers for his daughter. This "temporary" arrangement lasted over a year, during which Ariel was working three jobs while Dave stayed home all day gaming. She maxed out her credit cards while still coming home to cook and clean. Any time she brought up feeling overwhelmed, he’d clean up for a few days and then go right back to doing nothing.

That was the first red flag of many.

About a year ago, my partner and I planned a camping trip and invited Ariel and Dave so we could finally get to know him better. All our other friends backed out last minute, so it was just the four of us. The trip was a disaster. Dave made misogynistic comments constantly, showed zero affection toward Ariel (no hugs, compliments, nothing), and spent the whole trip drinking and smoking, which, yes, I know that's what you do when camping except dave had recently just been released from a psych ward for trying to kill himself, so he was on several different medications that, when mixed with alcohol, can induce seizures so my partner and I couldn't even enjoy our camping trip because we were worried we were going to have to drive Dave to the emergency room.

OH! and you want to know why dave tried to kill himself?! because his second baby mama said she didn't want to be with him anymore.... yep he was cheating on Ariel with his baby mama the whole time, and when he was admitted to the psych ward he put his baby mama down as the emergency contact, and when Ariel asked, Why didn't you put me down as your emergency contact? he simply said, "You're not my wife; she's my wife."

Since then, Ariel has tried to kick him out or break up with him more times than I can count, but every time he manipulates her with fake promises and minimal effort. The most recent time she told us she was finally done, my partner and I made the 7-hour drive to help her move his stuff out…only to find out he had “changed” and they were back together again.

She sent me a Snapchat saying things are going great, and that he’s even "thinking" about going to college for criminal justice…despite having a warrant out for his arrest and a pretty long rap sheet. He’s convinced he can become a police officer.

I haven’t talked to Ariel in over three weeks. I just don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this. It’s affecting my mental health, and I’m constantly angry or frustrated. I love her—we’ve been friends for over 8 years—but I don’t even recognize her anymore. I know people can get stuck in toxic relationships, but I don’t know how to be a good friend without destroying my own peace.

So Reddit… AITA for pulling away from my best friend because of her toxic boyfriend? Has anyone been in a similar situation and managed to stay friends? Or is it healthier to just walk away?

Any advice is appreciated.

TL;DR: My best friend is dating a toxic guy who’s manipulative, unemployed, and cheated on her. After two years of watching her struggle and enabling his behavior, I’m at my breaking point and don’t know if I can stay in her life. AITA for walking away?