I 32f broke up with my boyfriend 36 because I couldn’t take the 24/7 hack, spit phlem that he did.

From the moment he woke opened his eyes to the moment he fell asleep all you’d hear was haaaaaawk tuh- hawwwk hawwwwkk TUH- snort SNOOOORRRT HAWK TUH. He’d spit out the window, when we were walking, in the sink & toilet & bin leaving huge lugies of balls of flem for you to come across.

I begged him for over a year to go to a dr, to see a specialist. I even offered to pay. I have a family member who had the same issue and his step mother who he lived with said “NOOOOPE I CANT DO THIS GO TO THE DR OR MOVE OUT!” And they found out he had a nasal drip & needed strong nose sprays and a potential surgery to solve the issue.

So I explained this to my bf and told him “it could be a simple surgery for a deviated septum and you’ll have so much relief and I won’t be cringing around you. Please.”

I begged and pleaded and told him it was affecting my feelings and I would dread him coming over or going to his bc it was ALL the time. One time I counted and he snorted & hawked 20+ times in an hour. And not a light snort, he sounded like a Harley Davidson. Every. Single. Damn. Time.

He would respond with saying “I know I know it’s bad I should go dr, to I can’t help it I have bad allergies” but he’d never book an appointment. I found myself going out more and saying I was busy or staying with family so he wouldn’t come over or I couldn’t go to his to avoid it and then, I got the ick.

On top of that, he showed no affection. When I asked why he said he doesn’t know he’s just always been like that & he’s had relationships end bc they said he acts like he’s not interested. But if he wasn’t interested he wouldn’t be around so he doesn’t see the problem.

I stayed for a long time because 1 I didn’t want him to feel abandoned for something he couldn’t control (he did have bad allergies that was true) & 2 I didn’t feel like it was a justified reason to leave. He wasn’t nasty to me he didn’t verbally abuse me like past relationships but in the end, I couldn’t stand it. And he wouldn’t do anything about it.

So I want to know has anyone experienced this with a partner and am I the asshole? Because I still feel guilty but I also feel relief that I’ll never have to hear that SNOOOOORRRTT - HAWK -SPIT sound and have the image of phlem flying out his mouth ever again.

Thanks