I have been divorced for several years, we have 3 kids together. Our JOD states we get 50/50 custody; one week on, one week off. We get along pretty well, especially helping each other out with the kids. There are many times when we work together to help drive the kids around even if it isn't our week. Or sometimes we trade days because of family events, school activates, etc. We are both committed to the kids and try to do our best for them.

All that said, we are divorced for a reason. If it is not directly related to the children, I don't tell her anything about my life and I really don't care about hers. A few months back, she asked if I could take care of the kids for a couple days on her week because she needed to have surgery. I said yes and left it at that.

Several days later she calls me pissed off that I did not ask WHY she was having surgery.

My thoughts: It is a private matter and, honestly, I don't really want to know. I told her, I assumed if she wanted me to know, she would have told me. And I did not want to pry into her personal business. If you specifically tell someone you are having surgery but give no other details, I assume you don't want that person to know about it.

Her thoughts: "If my children's father was having surgery, I would want to know! It is important for my kids, so it is important to me."

So, am I an asshole for not asking about my ex-wife's surgery?

EDIT:

Thanks for all the response. It seems that most people are stating that I am NTA but are adding the caveat that I probably should have shown some concern or asked why simply for the sake of the kids. I concede this makes sense. In retrospect, I could have asked "Is everything ok?" Its a great way to ask more information without seeming intrusive.