am i the asshole here…the texting conversation goes like this, i will use M for me and S for sister S-Mom and dad said you still don't want to drive out here for easter? I've been planning for a month for us to have easter here He's def old enough to make the ride out here by then... so l'm confused

M - just not really something we're comfortable doing yet, not doing those long drives yet till he's 3 months, i know they can do longer stretches but it's just something i want to wait a bit longer for. didn't know you were planning easter and i don't want to disrupt plans you had!

S- Well I'm asking you to reconsider. I'm not sure what is uncomfortable. They can do 2 hours in the car. I feel like this is personal against us…. I want this to be comfortable place for you to come to... we try and be hospitable... Seems like every time you guys come here you are like dying to leave. I'm sad You have to do what you think is right but I needed to express this.

M - it's not personal, i'm sorry you feel that way it's not like that at all, but it's not really your place to tell us that we should when i said i wasn't comfortable yet, i don't really feel like i should need to explain and you could just be supportive and understanding of how i feel. It's nothing against you guys at all, we do feel comfortable at your house it's the car ride for a long period that makes me feel uncomfortable

S-Youre fear is not based on the recommendation So I pushed We will do easter separate

then she proceeds to call me and tell me there’s something wrong with me and she’s worried, like girl you haven’t come to visit your nephew once always something going on and you somehow have the right to be upset i don’t want to drive 45 min to you when i pump every 2 hours and don’t want to have to stress about getting my pump parts cleaned in time to convenience YOU, like i have a newborn why am i catering to what you want….im probably more upset about this then i should be but like idc… the tone she came at me with on the phone. saying i should take advice from others who have had kids….and i should get out more, WHEN SHE LITERALLY SAID A WEEK AGO HOW SHE NEVER WENT OUT when my niece was newly born. also my sister literally never leaves the house so idk why she is trying to call me out on that crap, like gets groceries delivered, works from home, has her husband pick up her daughter from school. like you don’t even do what you preach to others. I do understand that you can take longer car rides too at 2 months but i just don’t want to yet! Why do i need to get guilt tripped for that??? Also i literally told my parents that they can go to my sisters easter we will just stay home the 3 of us, it wasn’t a huge deal to me, i didn’t want to ruin any plans. But she literally told me and my mom both today that she’d been planning easter for a month? Like was i just supposed to magically know that, when i swear i mentioned to here before how i didn’t want to do long car rides till may…postpartum brain isn’t making me sure if i did mention that or not. Rant over!