Hey everyone — I’m 18F, and my stepmom is 55F. We both live in the same house. Before I turned 18, we had a good relationship, but it went downhill, and honestly, I don’t even remember why.

What really created a gap between us was the day of my senior homecoming dance — she grabbed my face to make me listen to her. I have trauma around people touching my face, and she knows that. Ever since then, it’s felt like walking on eggshells in our house, and it sucks.

For context, my dad did get after her for touching me. A few months after the incident, I talked to her about it because I had finally worked through it with my therapist. The conversation ended with her crying on my shoulder, hugging me, and saying she didn’t know her place in the house because of me. (For the record, I’ve never tried to be rude to her, though we’ll occasionally snap at each other if we’re having a bad day.)

Even after that, I still didn’t feel listened to, and I kept trying to express how I felt. My dad even agrees that she often doesn’t listen to anyone. We’ve tried to reconnect, but it hasn’t worked. She also makes snide remarks about me — especially when I cosplay or try to express myself.

So… am I an asshole for not really wanting to keep trying to reconnect with her?