I (27F) am getting married in three weeks to the love of my life, “Chris” (29M). (Am giving fake names btw) We’ve been planning this wedding for over a year—venue locked, vendors booked, dress tailored, the whole thing. It’s happening at my late grandfather’s vineyard, which was super sentimental to me growing up, and I’ve always dreamed of getting married there.

Enter my sister, “Maya” (24F).

Last weekend, during my bridal shower (that I paid for, btw), Maya decides to make a “special announcement.” She stands up, clinks her glass, and says she’s pregnant. Everyone gasps and starts congratulating her, and she cries and says she’s “so overwhelmed” and “didn’t expect to steal the show.” Like… then WHY DID YOU ANNOUNCE IT???

I pulled her aside and asked if she could’ve waited literally three weeks to share, and she goes, “I didn’t want to lie to people if they noticed my bump.” Girl… no one noticed anything until you said it out loud and sobbed into the cheese board.

Now my mom is acting like I’m being selfish and says I should “be happy for her” and “not everything is about me.” But this is literally my wedding. I have one day. Just ONE. Maya has nine months and a whole life of baby showers and birthdays. I asked her nicely not to bring up the pregnancy during the wedding events or do anything “announcement-y” and she said, “Wow. So I’m not even allowed to exist now?”

Chris thinks I should just let it go and “focus on us,” but honestly, I’m so irritated. She’s already getting more attention than I am, and I can’t shake the feeling she did it on purpose. She’s always been a little competitive with me.

So… AITA for wanting my sister to not make my wedding about her pregnancy?

Hi again, Reddit.

So for those who were confused, here is a background part to clear so of the confusion up

My sister Maya has always been the favorite. I know it sounds cliché, but if you grew up with my mom, you’d get it. Maya was the “baby” of the family, and I was the “responsible one.” That translated into me being the built-in babysitter, the one who got grounded for things she did, and the one who was constantly told to “understand she’s younger” even when we were both adults.

When I graduated college, my mom couldn’t even make it because she was helping Maya “through something emotional” (her on-and-off situationship broke up with her). When I got my first apartment, I invited everyone over to celebrate—Maya showed up two hours late, my mom left early because Maya was “having a rough day,” and no one even brought a housewarming gift. When Maya got a new job? Full-blown dinner, gifts, Facebook post, the works.

Any time I set a boundary or expressed hurt, I was told I was being dramatic, jealous, or “too sensitive.” I started keeping things to myself because it was easier to just not say anything than be gaslit into thinking I was overreacting.

So when Maya stood up at my bridal shower—an event she didn’t help plan, didn’t help pay for, and barely RSVP’d to—and announced her pregnancy, it wasn’t just a “random coincidence.” It was just another chapter in a very long book of me being pushed aside for her.

And when my mom took her side again, it was just... expected. Painful, but not surprising.

As of now, I haven’t canceled the wedding. In fact, I’ve asked my cousin (on my dad’s side, bless her) to be the one helping coordinate the family side of things so I don’t have to deal with my mom or Maya until the big day. Chris has been supportive, and we’ve talked through how we’re going to handle any drama if it pops up. Spoiler alert: zero tolerance.

I’m going to enjoy my wedding. Some family members on my mom's side like my aunt are asking to cancel the wedding to keep the peace (where the title comes from) but I deserve this wedding. I’ve worked hard for that. And if Maya or my mom want to make it about them, that’s on them.

Thanks to everyone who reminded me I’m not crazy for wanting one day that’s actually about me.