Hi Reddit. I’m in my 70s and recently went through a really difficult loss—my dog, Sweetie Muffin, passed away. She wasn’t just a pet; she was the love of my life. She had medical issues, including paralysis, and needed constant care. I was completely dedicated to her.

A few months ago, I had to be hospitalized unexpectedly. While I was gone, I arranged for her to be watched—Saturday night by my roommate, and Sunday night by my assistant. I asked my adult son (30s) to help out that weekend, but he chose to stay with his girlfriend (now wife) on Saturday night instead of coming over.

He did spend Sunday with me in the hospital, which was nice, but honestly—I needed him less than Sweetie Muffin did. She was fragile, and I just feel like he could’ve made a different choice.

Sweetie Muffin passed away that Sunday night from uremia. I was devastated. I still am. I can’t shake the feeling that if my son had just been there—even just sat with her—maybe she would’ve held on. Maybe she would’ve felt safe enough to keep going.

I told him this. I told him I felt like he let her die. I left several angry voicemails calling him a “narcissistic psycho man who let Sweetie Muffin die,” among other things. I know people say things they don’t mean when they’re grieving, but it’s how I felt in the moment. Plus he’s the one who let Sweetie Muffin die, not me.

He didn’t take it well and hasn’t spoken to me since. He didn’t let me speak at his wedding, even though I’m his father. He called it “setting boundaries.” I call it disrespectful. Now he’s apparently upset because I “interrupted” the mother of the bride’s speech to make a few lighthearted jokes for the room. I was just trying to bring some levity.

I’ve tried to make peace—I even left him a voicemail offering to take his in-laws out to dinner and give his father-in-law a nice pair of shoes I got from Temu. No response.

Some people say I’m taking it too far, but I feel like no one understands how much this dog meant to me. I just want some accountability, or at least acknowledgment.

AITA for saying my son let her die?