I (22F) never had a close relationship with my dad's wife, "Laura" (40sF). They got married when I was 17 after dating for about a year. She was always polite, but very pushy with trying to force a bond - calling herself my "bonus mom", buying me little girl-style gifts, commenting on how "mother-daughter energy" was so "natural" between us, etc. it always felt performative and awkward.

I never called her "mom". I never asked for another mother figure. I've been respectful but distant, especially after moving out for college. We don't talk much unless it's a family event.

Lest weekend, my dad threw a birthday dinner with extended family and some friends. During the toast, Laura stood up and said something like: "I'm just so proud to call this beautiful, strong young woman my daughter". And then smiled at me like we were having some Hallmark moment.

I was stunned. It felt fake and weird - especially with everyone watching. So I sad (as calmly as I could), "Laura, I'm not your daughter. I never have been. Please stop calling me that."

Everyone went dead silent. She looked like she'd just been slapped. Later, my dad pulled me aside and said I embarrassed her and made the night uncomfortable. He told me I could've just smiled and talked to her privately later.

But honestly? I've been smiling through it for five years. She crosses boundaries constantly and makes our relationship into something it's not. I felt cornered.

Now half the family says I was rude, and the other half says it's been a long time coming.

So... AITA?