Context: I f(52) married let’s call him Allan (m,53) in 2004. We were both single, he had a divorce behind him and one kid. I was a successful 32 yo with a great career in Training and Development at a well-known hotel/casino chain in South Africa, making good money with my own home and car. We married a year later and two years later welcomed our first and only child. That’s when the problems cropped up. In the beginning he doted on her, she was his everything. The minute she developed a personality though he turned. First I brushed it off, thinking he was struggling with job loss, loss of an older sibling and loss of a close friend. Over time though I noticed he often belittled her or demeaned her, and then claimed it was a joke. My daughter slowly grew apart from him and now they can barley stand each other. She often asks me to leave him. The problem came up last Saturday when we were going over our annual family trip. He’s not worked since 2006( when our daughter was born and his company closed down) and doesn’t contribute beyond taking care of our cat and doing laundry when he runs out of clean clothes. We were discussing what I would pay for and my daughter, who’s at school but works part time in a pizza shop said she’d buy the street food everything we went out. She knows I love street food and South Korea has long been a dream destination because of this. As she said this he mentioned that he wouldn’t eat any street food and she’d better make sure he ate at a proper restaurant. We both looked at this man who hadn’t contributed a cent in the whole of my daughters existence, and all hell broke loose. I told him that like Duchess Meghan ( I know, I know) I deserve a life of comfort after hustling and working hard to keep my family comfortable. I wanted someone who supported me financially and made my life more comfortable. I accused him of not being a real man since real men want to support their families. ( I’m still ashamed for this) Then I said that if he didn’t find a job within the next 6 months I was filing for divorce as I was tired of being his cash cow. He went stock still and just stared as if he didn’t know me at all. He’s since been withdrawn, not as lively and stopped talking to me and my daughter. He no longer laughs at his favourite sitcoms and his appetite has vanished. I’m wondering if I was wrong to say what I did. So, tell me, AITA?