Okay be for i get into it I'm sorry for grammar I'm on mobile and this is a thow away account cuz they're on reddit. ill have to be vague and change stuff about details cuz ya know there on reddit.

To start off I'll say this, I've grown up dealing with narcissists and people who will get on my ass for being straight forward. Ex: if I asked my dad to take me to a friend's he'd use that for mouths as a way to shut down any arguments I had, but if I insisted it and beat around a bush he'd eventually do it with no fuss. This is a example of somthing that has happened and I'm putting it here to explain my thoughts and actions.

Okay so here's everyone involved my friend sam (20f), Sam's ex Jason(21m), Sera (?f) me (22m) and my girlfriend Emi (21f) ill give other people random names so this isn't to long.

Some important backstory, all of us live in different states my and Emi are long distance due to stuff I won't go into. 1. So sam has had no luck in romantic partners and she's a hopeless romantic, she's the type to dip out on all of her friends for a week or two when she gets into a relationship and get HEAVILY tinted red glasses. She was in a year long with this pos who didn't care about her and manipulated her alot. She never told anyone about it till near the end

1. She has a shit home life, no exaggeration when I say she was living in the garage with no heating in -20f temps she wasn't allowed in the main house when others were asleep and couldn't eat past dinner even if she wasn't there, her father also had a strangle hold on her entire life and much more but I can't expose to much. Needless to say that emi and I wanted to get our friend out of that so we got an escape plan ready that involved her leaving and going to emi's since it was only a 2 day drive.

A week in to planing she put forward a want to keep her family in her life so we made some modifications to the plan but she had already told her dad that she was going to move out in 6 mouths and he started to become more controlling and strict he even threatened to shut down her internet if she disobeyed him again and he did on a few times.

So we had to get her out fast since it quite obvious what he was doing, we made modifications to the plan and had to so she could leave in 2 weeks and tell her family she had gotten a job in emi's state and that she was going to move in with a friend.

When she told em sudenly the dad lossened his grip and him and her step mom started to try and convince her not to leave then her grandmother sudenly started having some medical issues and wanted to take her to a musical in mid April.

When she had brought this up to me and emi, emi mentioned the fact that she can always go back for a visit and how if she stayed he would most likely be stuck there.

She was determined on leaving till she met Jason and all of a sudden she wanted to stay she met this man they started dating the whole time I'm telling her your going to move you shouldn't make connections like that right now.

Then the day before go time her family says that she can move in with her grandmother and she agreed. Cool great wonderful, now here the big bit her grandmother is essentially a pawn for her dad. Sure she has a bit more freedom now but she still can't order door dash, has a curfew and most important is still under her dad's control.

So now her and Jason are dating they date for a whole 2 months Before he says that oh no he wants a heram and he asexual sure bud. So they break up. Emi and I help comfort sam and I somehow hold back the "I told you so" I wanted to say but hay I know how that sucks.

This leads to where the fun begins. Pardon if details are a bit sketch if I'm to specific, instant giveaway.

So Sam starts a improve minecraft server hoping to have it like an smp. She invites me and gave me permission to do what I want and I do i make a background story and start building little mysterious structures and thing to the world.

This leads to a few days ago when she gets me and Emi in a private call and tells me that it feels like I'm taking control, and asks if i can take a step back. She had talked to Emi aswell and Emi told me she was no longer interested in playing on the server.

(backstory from Emi side: Emi had an ongoing issue with Sam and so Emi was avoiding Sam for a bit. I don't understand it but I accept it.)

Ultimately this has crushed my creativity...

Anyways later that day while i was playing on the server I notice how Sam was acting differently twords a buddy of ours sera's Boyfriend, he's a bit of an ass when he gets netherite tho so I put it to that.

Later I found she that Sam started dating Sera in a weird poly situation and that Sera said the n word. but that's all I got i spend all night at work putting all the places together.

I have to leave out some details because they would expose me but I'll try my best .

So after I got home went to sleep woke up I had sent them a message cuz I wanted to talk about this, but this is where I made mistake 1. I brought emi 2.i kept getting pulled away to deal with medical stuff at home 3. I was operating on incomplete information.

So it started off well enough but I was beating around the bush talking about how I noticed Sam was more confident and stuff like that then I got pulled away, when I came back Sam and Emi where both pissed and Sam asked me is this cuz I'm in a relationship now?. I froze cuz i wasn't sure what happened then as I went to awenser I was pulled away again. When I came back both Emi and Sam had left.

I got a text a bit later from sam Asking Me to leave em alone, I responded "I'll be here" And that was the last time I talked to her.

When I asked Emi what happened she had told me she had gotten angry and told Sam she was going to dip out of Sam's servers due to what her partner said. Sam replied with "i dont want drama" And that she was upset that I couldn't be straight forward with her.

But I can't be she never listens when I'm straight with her she listens for a second then takes none of it. ITS SO FUSTRATING.

But ya even then this didn't make sence why was she so upset so I asked Emi and our friend C few more questions, and got some Answers.

So Sam told a third party but had told them not to tell me and Emi and had also told C she can't trust us since we tried to make her move away from her family. And I'm Hella confused i feel like I'm being sabotaged. Or that my names being smeared.

I'm so pissed off about this like we know how bad her family was to her and the abuse she went through and she's mad we set cash aside to get her out of that ???

Emi had apologized for being upset and snaping at Sam but never got a response. It's been about 3 days now.

I'm not sure if this is all my fault I wish that my friend would at least try and talk to me bout it but she wants space I guess I'll just wait aperenly Sam was in a gc with Emi and a few others but I was asleep due to work so I missed it.

I'll try and answer any questions to the best of my ability.

So reddit AITAH for beating around the bush while asking a friend if they're in a relationship? And can I get some advice?