AITAH for cutting all contact with my brother for his partner call my fiancé a slur?

Hi! I’m honestly in a rock and a hard place. (P.s. all names are fake) My fiancé Frank (M29) and me (F25) have been together for two years. This might be kind of long. so sorry for that. But here is some background. (Family background) I’m from the family of six. Where I am the second oldest. I have an older sister, Brittney (27), a younger sister, Mary (22), A younger trans brother, Kyle (20) [important to the story] the baby brother, Scott (16) and the baby girl, Susie (7). My family has gone through tough times with Kyle coming out as trans. My family is very religious. And my parents did not take it well, but now it’s all okay. Cause they would “rather have a son than no child at all.” (Relationship background) My fiancé Frank is from Romania. And I am from America. I traveled to Romania to study abroad and ended up meeting my man and falling in love. We got engaged and came back to America for him to meet my family and possibly move here. He’s honestly amazing and I love him so much.

On with the story! I am 9 months pregnant (yay!) after dealing with PCOS and infertility for most of my adult life. And Frank and I can’t be happier. About a month ago we went to dinner with my whole family. We have these dinners once a month just to catch up and hang out. But my brother Kyle decided to bring his partner to dinner this time. And we were all shocked to say the least. My brother’s partner who we’ll call Andrew. Is one of the kids I used to babysit as a teenager.

I feel like I need to say this. When I would babysit Andrew and their siblings, Kyle would help me. And after I moved away Kyle took over the babysitting. So seeing them together really makes my stomach churn.)

Andrew is 15! And my brother is 20! To say I was very.. surprised is an understatement. The night went well but I was extremely uncomfortable. I pulled my parents aside and asked them if they knew about Kyle’s partner. And they said they had no idea. I ended up pulling Kyle aside and asking him how they got together and how long. And he told me that it just happened. And that he has permission from Andrew’s parents to be dating. My other younger siblings knew about this and said nothing. They support them fully.

My older sister Brittney and I talking about how wrong their age gap was when Frank overheard us talking. And we clued him in on what was happening. And he was extremely understanding of why I was so upset and uncomfortable.

That night when we got home Frank and I talked more about it and he confessed to me that he is extremely uncomfortable with the thought of Kyle being around our baby when she is born. He is her father and wants to do everything to protect her. And I was like I haven’t seen any other predatory signs from Kyle growing up and this might be a one time thing. But he then explained it wasn’t just the age gap relationship. If we leave our baby with Kyle for a babysit or something they will possibly teach her that age gap relationships don’t matter and how that it’s okay for child to date an adult.

So we both decided that we would talk to Kyle snout our fears. So we got with our parents and Kyle and his partner last week and sat down and talked. And this is how it went..

I started off by talking about how much I love him and will support him in anything. But that their relationship is not really legal and how uncomfortable it is for me. Kyle and I used to babysit Andrew. And this is extremely weird for Frank and me. Kyle: I’m sorry that our relationship makes you uncomfortable. But we love each other and we wanna stay together till marriage. Me: I understand that. But can you see at how it looks to the law and everyone else? Your relationship is only legal cuz you have Andrew’s parents permission. Doesn’t that make you uncomfortable? Kyle: I guess I can see it when you put it that way. But that doesn’t change my feelings for them.

We went back and forth like this for awhile. Till Andrew finally put their few words in. Andrew: just admit you don’t like our relationship cuz you’re transphobic! You can’t stand to see two trans people happy together. This is where Frank got upset. No. It’s because you are a minor dating a fully grown adult. Do you really think that people are going to trust Kyle around their children? Because we won’t. Andrew started yelling and screaming about how that’s transphobia. I got super upset by this and said no that if you two can’t see how awful this relationship is I can’t have you around my baby. I will not have you teaching her that children can date adults. Kyle then got more upset and started yelling as well, and telling us how we are just bigots and how our daughter is going to hate us and how we’re going to be terrible parents and how maybe my infertility was keeping me from being a mom because I’m a horrible person. At this I started crying.

I went thru five miscarriages and each one was more devastating than the last.

I got up and left and my mom came with me. I heard more yelling and then Kyle and Andrew stormed out and left. When we went home Frank told me what happened after I and my mom left.

So after I left the group. Frank started yelling at them that they have no right to talk about me that way and how Kyle knows how painful each miscarriage is for me. Then Andrew said got up in Frank’s face and said that he’s just a stupid gypsy and how he knows nothing. And they stormed out. Frank wants us to go no contact with them. My parents and my two younger siblings are saying to give them another chance cuz they were just angry and how I’m a a-hole for siding with my fiancé and not my family and how my fiancé and I have almost the same age gap as them and have no way to judge them. So AITAH for siding with my man over my brother and his partner?