Long story short my SIL has been in constant competition with me since I began dating my husband. As soon as we got engaged & picked a date, she had to get engaged and rush a wedding to be first. Then as soon as we were expecting our first, she announced she was expecting her first. Both of our second-borns actually ended up having the same due date. There’s lots more to it than that, but trying to stay brief.

She has been a constant source of drama at various intervals in our life and has complex relationships with all of her siblings to say the least. Whenever a major life event occurs for someone else, she is usually stirring up drama to make sure the attention is redirected back to her.

Anyways, SIL has recently announced her 3rd pregnancy & has stated regardless of gender, she plans to use a name that has been on mine & my husband’s list for a girl for 7 years. She claims to have not known this name was on our list, but the rest of the family did so that is difficult for me to believe. Had our 2nd born been a girl we would have used the name. After “discovering” it was on our list she sent the family group text a message saying: “It was brought to my attention that the name we chose for our baby, is a name that is also on X’s list and that is apparently causing problems. I did not know that nor was that ever mentioned to me until recently. We didn’t pick that name to upset anyone but it’s a name that’s been on our list as well. I would hope you all know me better than to assume we would pick a name to purposefully upset any of you. However, at this time we are not changing it. I would appreciate the support of my family but I understand we are all entitled to our own feelings. Thank you and have a good day.”

I found the message infuriating and upsetting. I think if she wanted to actually problem solve this she should have spoken with me & my husband directly. I also don’t believe that she isn’t trying to upset anyone because of the history of drama she has started in the past. I still want to have a 3rd baby but we are waiting for the time to be right for our family.

After expressing that we did not approve of her name, we were told names are “first come first serve” and that we already had 2 chances to use the name.

AITAH for being upset over this?