So, I (20F) have bipolar disorder, and recently, my relationship with my partner (25M) has been really rocky. I try to be understanding, but he’s constantly making jokes about me that hurt. His jokes range from “No one talks about your dog, sorry, just a joke” to “Baby, you look like a gnome, you're short.” These things upset me, and I often end up crying, which I’m sure triggers my mood swings. But when I react to his jokes seriously, he groans, sighs, and says stuff like, "Here we go again" or "Not this shit again." I know my mood can flip easily, but I feel like his jokes are disrespectful, and when I get upset, he acts like I’m overreacting.

He’s constantly telling me I’m the only one who gets mad, yet he’s super defensive. He drives three older women from work, which I know is normal, but I can’t help but feel jealous and question it. He calls me baby, wifey, and fiancée, but we’ve been engaged for months, and I haven’t seen any action on it, like, where’s the proposal? Am I asking too much for him to show commitment?

On top of that, he judges my outfits if even 2% of my stomach is showing. He doesn’t let me wear skirts, crop tops, short dresses, or even shorts. He says it’s not okay for me to wear them, which makes me feel suffocated. He also forces me to stop smoking, even though smoking is one of the ways I cope with my emotions. I know it’s unhealthy, but I feel like he’s taking control of things I enjoy, which just makes me feel worse.

When I get emotional or have a depressive episode, he completely shuts down and doesn’t engage. He'll ignore me or just say something like, "I can’t deal with this right now," and that just pushes me away more. If I scream at him for this behavior, I get labeled as crazy or too emotional.

So, am I the asshole for wanting more consideration from him, or is this just me overreacting due to my bipolar disorder?