Edit: this is a repost because I didn’t realise I couldn’t post about relationships on the other AITA board and would still love some advice.

Okay so this really isn’t a big deal but I want to know how I should have navigated this situation.

So I (30M) love the way my wife (29F) looks. When she gets ready to go out, I compliment her. When she comes home from a long day at work, I compliment her. When she comes out of the shower, I compliment her. I find it not hard to stare at her because she’s so attractive to me.

My wife has always had self-image issues and usually hates how she looks. I reassure her that I think she looks great but she always says if she doesn’t feel great, it doesn’t matter what I say.

So a few months ago when she was getting in the shower I said “wow, you’re looking so good today” to which she replied with “yeah it’s because I haven’t eaten anything today and that’s why I’m skinny”

A few days after this, she told me very gently “can you please stop complimenting me about how my body looks because I’ve stopped eating now because you said I looked good when I wasn’t eating and it really stuck me.” I apologized and told her I won’t mention anything to do with how her body looks.

Now recently, my wife has been eating well and exercising and has definitely lost some weight and she is looking really good (I have not told her this because she told me not to mention it)

Fast forward to yesterday when she came out wearing these new jeans and asked how she looked because “I never used to be able to wear these because they were too small but now they fit me perfectly” to which I just said “yeah it looks great on you”

Apparently that was not the right answer. “Oh I thought you were gonna at least say my ass looks good or that I look skinny or something but I guess not”

I told her I didn’t want to say anything about her body because she told me not to, and she just replied “yeah but sometimes I want you to”

How am I supposed to know when I can and can’t comment on her looks?! AITAH?!