I love my bf but I have a lot of past issue. My ex went to visit a friend at uni for 2 days and ended up sleeping with 3 girls there - he then came home to me, acted like it was all fine, fucks me and then breaks up with me. I found some things on his phone that night but nothing that made me certain. His friend then bumped into me a few months later and told me the truth. My point being that things can be hidden if you want them to be.

My boyfriends best friend (M21) has told him that he’s booked them a ‘sweaty rave’ and to keep X date free. I’ve expressed to my bf that if he does go, it will make me uncomfortable and that it is a boundary for me. He agreed not to go because he was prioritising me and I felt relieved, I said maybe in the future or maybe if we go together to one but for now - it’s not something I’m comfortable with him doing. I feel guilty about it but I know he’ll get really high and won’t stay in touch with me when he goes, and it’s not lack of trust with my current partner, its just previous baggage that does still kinda hurt.

We had an argument today where he said that he’s now going and doesn’t care what I think and that he’s also booking a lads holiday to somewhere like Tenerife etc. Trying to seem unbothered I told him that I’d be booking a girls holiday (not true) so he should go.

He now says that he’s going and has a screenshot of me saying it’s okay for him to do that..

Am I the arsehole for not wanting him to go?