I (F25) moved to a different country to my mum (F60) about 6 years ago. She lives with my brother (M23), but he doesn't come up.

She has always relied on me emotionally like a friend, as she doesn't really hang out with people her age and she feels invalidated by her siblings. I have tried being there for her as best I can, but I feel like she often wears me down with requests until I say yes. I don't feel like I can think for myself around her, like I'm back to being a teenager. Last Christmas made me feel completely unsafe.

We have three dogs in the family home, they are absolutely beautiful but very protective as mastiff-types tend to be. One of them is the child of the other two, so hasn't known me as long. This has been a problem before. On Christmas day, the dog bit my arm and my head.

It was absolute agony, but the worst part of it was that my mum started crying and mumbling "oh god what do you want me to do? what do I do?" like genuinely asking me for advice in that moment. I couldn't even sit there and be injured, I had to tell her to get some water to wash the blood off and get something to put pressure on it.

She never even suggested A&E, she wanted to do it all herself but didn't know where to start and needed me to tell her. She spent the rest of the day wailing that she felt like the victim and that she can't even "do normal things like raise my voice at my family". She didn't ask me a single time if I wanted medical attention, and when I brought it up she said "they're probably busy today".

All this to say, Easter is coming up soon and she wants to see me and my partner (NB23). She started asking months ago to see where I stood, and eventually I caved in so she bought the tickets.

But now I am having second thoughts because I remember how unsafe I've always felt in that house especially given last Christmas, and I have no desire to put my partner through that too.

We have considered getting an airb&b nearby, but they're expensive now. The safest thing would be to not go, for everyone involved. The plane tickets are non-refundable, so that would be an extra frustration.

I'm worried I might be the AH because she's booked those tickets already, and she really wants to see me and my partner. She hasn't seen them for a long time now. So it might look like I'm being lazy or can't be bothered.

TLDR; my mum has a history of being emotionally dependant on me and last Christmas she let the family dog bite me and called herself the victim for it. AITAH if I don't want to go back to my mum's house for Easter?