I (27F) have been dating my boyfriend (30M) for about a year and a half. Things have been going well—he’s sweet, we talk about moving in together, and I’ve met his family a few times. His mom, however, has never liked me. I don’t know why. I’m polite, successful, I bring gifts, I make an effort—but she treats me like I’m just some random he picked up off the street.

Last weekend, it was her birthday, and my boyfriend planned this big family dinner at a fancy restaurant. I offered to help pay, and he said it’d be nice if I covered half since we were splitting the bill between “the kids” (his siblings and us).

Cool, no problem.

Dinner’s going well—until his mom raises a toast and says: “I’m just so happy to be surrounded by family… and some of the newer, hopefully temporary additions.” Then she looks directly at me and smiles.

The whole table laughed awkwardly. I looked at my boyfriend like, “Are you gonna say something??” and he just gave me a please don’t make a scene face.

So I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and when I came back, I told the waiter, “Split my items to my own bill please. I’m paying for myself and that’s it.” Paid my part. Left.

Later, my boyfriend texted saying I was “disrespectful” and “made a scene over a joke,” and now his mom thinks I’m dramatic and unstable.

I told him the disrespect came from his mom, and if he’s okay with her calling me “temporary” after a year and a half, maybe she’s right.

He hasn’t responded since yesterday.

AITAH?