For some context, I am 19 and disabled. I am legally blind in both of my eyes, chronically ill (POTS/Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome), Familial Hypercholesterolemia (119lbs), Gilberts Syndrome, PTSD, MDD, ADHD, & GAD. All diagnosed over a long, horrible period of 10 years.

My brother is 23 and diagnosed with ASD (previously labeled as Asperger Syndrome, now Autism. He is high functioning.)

Graduating high school was absolutely horrible for me. I struggled heavily for so many years and was constantly told to put my physical and mental issues to the side because "education is more important." There were mornings where I was throwing up, having flare ups, passing out, and I was still forced to go to my regular public school. Where, of course, nothing got better. So I was just constantly sick in school. I had to move schools twice due to my grades plummeting, because I was genuinely not able to do my work when my body was failing me.

My brother had disciplinary issues early on in school because my parents never punished him. He knew how to wear them down to get what he wanted. So naturally, in school, he didn't get the same grace and kept getting in trouble. My parents pulled him from public school in middle school and tossed him into a special education school. He was doing 7th grade math in his senior year. No standardized testing. They held his hand the whole way through when he is SO unbelievably smart and capable to do more. They gave him a diploma for free. I was watching my brother who was reading medical textbooks as a child, a tech whiz, be put on the same learning level as a kid who doesn't know the alphabet yet.

By the time we both had graduated high school, it was time to look for work. This was when my POTS had its first major flare, leaving me bedridden for two weeks and undergoing extensive cardiac testing that took over 8 months of hell to get through and finally get a diagnosis.

By this time, my brother had a number of jobs, one at a time. The first one was a publix job. He didn't like that he had to push carts in the heat, so he quit because he got lazy. The second job, seasonal and went out of buisness. The third one barely gave him any hours despite him having an amazing work ethic and doing tremendously due to the company having too many workers that they didn't want to lay off, so he quit. Fourth one, he quit because he didn't like that it was a faster paced job (waffle house). His current job, same issues with hours. He works maybe once a week for 4-6 hours, twice if he's lucky. So he's been looking for more job opportunities.

Meanwhile, I've come to terms with the fact that I can't be on my feet for more than 3 hours a day (a GOOD day) without my heart jumping to the 200's and making me pass out with the urge to vomit and shit myself all at once while I have seizure-grade convulsions. My vision is degenerating, I legally can't drive anymore because of my vision, and every single day is a gamble. My mom finally decided to help me out and apply for SSI/disability benefits. I'll never be able to make enough money to provide for myself, even with benefits. I'll most likely be stuck living with my parents until I die or end up with a caregiver in my 30's. I'm currently waiting on the 200 day process to see if I get benefits.

My brother has applied to, no joke, around 50 places. Maybe scored about 15 interviews. No one is hiring right now, especially with the current state of the economy. He is getting increasingly pissed with it, and has been begging my mom to set him up with a SSI application.

I told him like, listen, you're able to work. You can do your job, with or without reasonable accommodation for being autistic. Your autism isn't preventing you from working, it's the fact that no one is hiring or willing to put you on for more hours, and that isn't due to your autism either. You're able to work, you're able bodied, half of the good paying jobs you had, you quit because you got lazy and didn't want to do the actual work. That doesn't give you the right to government compensation. I don't even want to have to rely on SSI, but I'm going through the process because I physically cannot work, not even from home. It's a last resort for me, and you're wanting to abuse a system made to help people who can't work because you don't want to put in the extra mile. I get that it sucks that people aren't hiring you right now, or scheduling you for more hours, but if that reason alone justified government compensation, half of the world would be putting taxpayers and the government in even more debt right now.

Then he goes on and on about how it's Trumps fault and how it's not his fault, that it's the district his company works for, that him quitting his other jobs wasn't his fault, and that he DESERVES money from the government because of what the government is doing right now.

I'm already pissed about SNAP benefits getting cut, because that would have helped me tremendously in the future for if/when I DO get on SSI benefits, so I can save up more instead of spending that money on food. But he just doesn't get it.

The money that he does get from his paychecks, he spends on doordash, and shitty, overexpensive cartoon merchandise. Then he will complain about how he has no money and how it's the governments fault and how the government should owe him money.

I straight up told him off, and he INSISTED that he deserves disability benefits and that I'm wrong. This just genuinely bugs me on such a deeper level than the normal brother/sister feuding. I asked him about his other jobs, and I was like "Was the heat too overstimulating for you or something? Was working at waffle house too overwhelming?" And the answer is always just, "I dunno, I just didn't like it. I'd rather do something else."

I explained the ADA laws to him, how disability benefits actually work, and he just refuses to listen. I have half a mind to let him apply and just let him get rejected, but I know he will lie his ass off on that application to sweeten his side of things and give him a better chance.

I wish I could work, so badly. I was a super active kid, an active teen, and now I'm just stuck. Watching someone who has the ability to work but just doesn't want to demand benefits from the government? It hurts, and apparently according to my mom as well, I'm the asshole for thinking he shouldn't even apply.