So, I (31F) just got home after a long day at work, and my husband (33M) was supposed to be keeping an eye on our toddler (2M) while I was out. Normally, he’s pretty good at watching our little one. I don't think much of it because he always baby sits on his days off this time of year. Our son goes to daycare most days when neither of us are home for most of the day.

Last night he made a bad "mistake" as I probably shouldn't call it. As soon as I walked in the door, I noticed it was quiet and my toddler makes a lot of sound when he hears the door. I assumed maybe they were both outside. I walk into the living room to see my husband sitting at the TV playing his game. I heard the sound of our toddler crying so I sprinted to the back patio, and my heart dropped when I saw our little one on the pool ladder, barely holding on, tears streaming down his face.

I rushed over, scooped him up, and reassured him that everything was okay. After making sure he was fine, I turned to my husband, who was still glued to the couch, headphones on, completely engrossed in whatever game he was playing. I felt a surge of anger wash over me. I started yelling, I couldn’t help it. I asked him how he could have let our child wander off like that, especially with an open pool just a few feet away.

My husband finally looked up from his game, bewildered but mostly defensive. He tried to brush it off, saying he was only gone for a few minutes and that toddlers wander sometimes. I snapped back that that was exactly why he should have been watching him, especially when I told him I was leaving for work.

Things escalated, and we ended up having a huge argument. He claimed I was overreacting, that he didn’t need to babysit our son constantly and that he trusted him to be safe. I pointed out that trusting doesn’t mean neglecting him and that I shouldn’t have to come home to find our son in such a precarious situation.

Now, I’m sitting here feeling like maybe I went too far. He didn't say hi to me this morning, instead went straight to work. He always greets me in the morning. I am scared what might happen when he comes as when he lets his anger soak, he can get very violent.