The backstory- I went to elementary school with a lady by the name of lu. We reconnected back in 2021 and randomly do dinner etc etc. Nothing sexual or anything that would cross the line if either of us were in a relationship. The morning of her birthday I sent a text wishing her happy birthday and how much I appreciated the friendship. I sent flowers to her job as a gift stating “happy 35th birthday” with a random name that I saw she was friends with on Facebook “Heather”. I didn’t put my name on it because we’ve talked about her coworkers being in her business and wondering when she would start dating etc etc. later that day she texted me and asked if I had a delivery to her job I first joked about it and then said yes.

The next message I got was how it get feel uncomfortable, turns out the name “Heather” is also her sisters name and somehow she too felt uncomfortable about the situation (I didn’t put a last name so they assumption of it being her sister was on her part, as she knows multiple heathers), how she wants transparency and finally that it made her feel also uncomfortable that I had 2 videos on TikTok of my ex from 2021, one is of her in the shower “drunk singing” but the door is one that you can see a shadow but not detail, and another video is of her on the toilet (nothing can be seen). Lu goes in to explain that she has a daughter and wants to protect her from people that she doesn’t feel comfortable with. I’m also a father of two girls and they’ve never seen the videos but I’m also unsure how it has anything to do with her child but it’s what she stated.

Looking back on the situation I regret sending the flowers and truly would have enjoyed continuing our friendship but I won’t force myself in any situation and the judgement without caring to ask regarding the TikTok videos was enough for me to understand where I stand. I’ve typed up several different responses but all in all, I’ve decided to not respond and leave the conversation where it stands. I feel that responding will only be me trying to talk her out of her feelings because I completely disagree with some of the things stated.

Am I crazy for sending flowers?