So a bit of background I 23F, have worked at my job for 3 years. About a year and a half a go we had a new guy M29 join the company who worked in a different office to me - I work in the Manchester office, he works in the London office so quite a distance. For those who don’t live in the UK, that’s about a 2 hour train journey so he isn’t someone I see everyday. Just a couple of times a year at company events or if I work from the London office which isn’t often.

About a year ago, we had a company event and me and him got talking. He was really sweet and we got along really well. We spend a lot of time getting to know eachother. At these events, everyone has a little bit of a drink so our conversation after a few, got a little bit flirty. Me and few others ended up in his hotel room after the bar had closed just hanging out but nothing more than flirting happened between us.

Following on from the event, there were a few messages between us and he basically said that he couldn’t keep talking to me because he had a girlfriend but their relationship wasn’t great so he was going to sort things out with her and then would let me know. I didn’t really hold onto that though and didn’t message him any further after finding out he was in a relationship. I left it up to him and stayed out of it but appreciated him being honest with me.

Over the next few months, there were a few messages back and forth about work and whether I was going to work events but that was it until this week. There was another work event and we were both there. We pretty much spent the entire night together and got really close. He told me him and his girlfriend were no longer together so we ended up flirting all night. He was really sweet to me and we had a great time together. Anyway, one thing led to another and he ended up in my hotel room. I had no intention of sleeping with him or anything. We just cuddled for the majority of the night and talked. He said to me that he wasn’t sure what level of commitment he could give me because of the distance between us and the fact he has a daughter. I appreciated his honestly. He also said that he had been texting his ex because he felt bad for her as she is originally from Spain and has no family in London. Again I respected that. One thing led to another and I ended up sleeping with him… we had a great night together and I didn’t regret it one bit. I genuinely wanted to get to know him more and see where things could go.

Fast forward to the day after and I don’t know why but I decide to see if I can find him on social media so we can continue getting to know eachother outside of work. I managed to find his Instagram but it was on private however, his bio was “A 🔒” which I thought was weird. I then found his Facebook and it said he was in a relationship. However, this relationship had only been announced a few days before so it’s fairly new. I honestly felt sick to my stomach at the fact I had been lied to. I also don’t go sleeping around as that’s not something I like to do so he was only the second guy I had slept with and I trusted him.

Now I don’t know what to do… AITAH if I message his girlfriend about it? Or should I confront him? Do I just not mention it at all and have no more contact with him? I honestly am so stuck on what to do….