Not gonna lie. I think I’m right 100% but my life is crashing and burning right now so I need some validation from strangers on the internet.

Let me set the scene: I am a 39yo who moved back to my home town to help take care of my mom who was dying on Alzheimer’s. I am a single mom with 2 boys (12 and 14) who are legitimately really good kids. I work as a special education teacher in a title 1 school which does not pay a lot but I love it.

My dad (parents divorced when I was a kid) offered to let us rent out one of the many homes that he owns (he earns his money as a landlord) for the same price as the small apartment I was currently renting. I was really concerned about renting from my dad because he has historically used money and favors to try and dictate what I do with my life. But with my disabled mom and 2 kids it seemed like the best choice at the time.

We have been model tenants. Ive never been late paying rent. Take care of the property and have even invested my own money to paint it and fix it up. About 6 months ago one of the kids I used to work with who is now about 20 (let’s call him Aaron) came back from basic training (army reserves) and he couldn’t find a place to live. I found out he was living out of his car and told him he could stay with us. My mom died last year so we had an extra room. Growing up my mom always told me that we were blessed to have a house and that we should always help people when we can.

Aaron is a great kid. He helps around the house, is kind, thoughtful and a great role model for my kids. Everything is working out great and here’s where the drama starts. Aaron is black. My dad has always been the kind of racist where he is fine with black people over there, never uses the n-word but he definitely objects to black people in his neighborhood or around his family. (Side note) My dad was also a drunk for the majority of my life but had been sober 5 years when we moved down. I knew that I would probably never have a good relationship with my dad but I thought that maybe he could have something with my kids.

I could feel this tension building up between us right away and I just started avoiding him so that we wouldn’t fight. Last week my 12 yo kid comes home from my dad’s house and tells me about how he got in trouble and my dad took his bike away. (He lied about something stupid like accidentally spilling something in the garage). My dad then proceeded to chew him out, cuss at him, calls him a ‘lying little worm’ and tell him that he was less than dogshit. This is not ok. I confront my dad and instead of talking about how he was bullying his 12 yo grandson he decides to bring up Aaron.

We wants me to kick Aaron out. Gives a whole bunch of excuses about how Aaron (not the hormonal middle school boys) is putting extra wear and tear on the house and a whole bunch of other obviously racist excuses about why I should kick Aaron back out onto the street. I refuse. In return my dad decides to evict us all.

We are now all homeless. Living out of motels and trying desperately to find a place to rent. I know that if I went to my dad and apologized and kicked Aaron out of our lives he would happily give us the house again, but I refuse. I haven’t told my kids or Aaron the real reason that my dad evicted us because I don’t want anyone feeling like it is anyone’s fault other than his.

I am so angry and hurt and things are so hard right now but I refuse to give into his racist bullshit. It isn’t even about Aaron at this point. It’s about principles. I will not let my dad bully me into submission, but that’s also taking a toll on my kids too. They’ve been great and as supportive as kids can be but I can see the toll it’s taking on them.

So I really need some internet strangers to support me and tell me that I’m doing the right thing. I need people to tell me that’s it’s gonna be ok and that everything will work out cause right now it doesn’t feel like it. It feels like I’m burning down my whole life and my kids lives because I made this decision for all of us.

Anyways. Thanks for listening. I’m gonna go back to crying in my car for a while.