Original https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1jq1gri/aitah_for_wanting_simple_divorce_because_i_am_not/?share_id=hFp7CMLNNeLjJ-cTtyYV3&utm_content=1&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_source=share&utm_term=1&rdt=45692

I had to delete my original id because I got depressed by the comments. But later I realized i am not going to lie to myself and can't please everyone. Also I will make some points clear in comments I didn't factor cultural differences between west and asian expectations in marriage.

1. I was called gold digger. I make my own money and way more than him. No I have nothing to dig here. Bridal stores are multi billion business in my country. I make good money. Also I don't know how tough it is to open business in usa and west.

   But I started my store during last year of college as attendance wasn't mandatory. Easy to get bank loan and my father gave his empty shop to open it. My husband got lease from his own relative. Promoted our businesses though insta ads. And it worked out . Third world countries also have upper middle class people you know, who can afford foreign vacations. So please clear your facts.

2. People called me names and that's their perspective. I agree. But I would rather true to myself. I am 24 and I am not ready for such hard task at this age raising pre teens. Paying for their schools , college etc. And I would have to delay my own motherhood. Which I want in three to five years. When I am mentally prepared. People wished me to be infertile. I hope you grow up. Having a kid, when I am mentally prepared is different from raising pre teens. Yeah I failed at my vows I guess. But staying in resentful marriage gonna harm us more in long run.

3. People said i am selfish for not raising kids. Here know the fact that my husband would barely help in any household task. He already does it rarely. And I am not ready to be servant for next decade. This is not what I want for myself. I know men in your countries do 50 50 chores and that is good thing. I wish I could say same. But I will be responsible for their care. While he will only contribute financially.

Anyways i and my ex met for final discussion. He asked me to come back and take on motherly duties for his siblings. I refused. I said I understand, he can't go back and leave his siblings in others care.. I won't make divorce process tough for him.

We started crying. He said he can't handle all house work and his shop. Though we have househelp. He feels overwhelmed and he said I can do this better. I said no and I am not gonna do that. He got angry and said then it is best we divorce and he can remarry to some poor and less educated woman , who can help his household than someone educated who can't even help. And called me some colorful names ( randi - equivalent of whore )

It pinched, but I didn't argue and we are starting divorce proceeding soon. I know it is tough for him. But I don't want to be bitter mother figure. We have some savings which we will split. That's it.

The whole process is mentally draining and I am gonna take some break from dating again and find myself. I got married too young because of puppy love during college days. I wasn't ready for all this and I want to be mentally mature enough next time I marry. Yes I want kids and I will take care of motherly duties, when the time comes. But at this point in life, that isn't going to happen.

I want to enjoy fruit of my labour for some years before I give up my life for my children. The sacrifices it requires , I am not up for it.

This is final update and I will delete this id because I know I am gonna get abused here. That's ok but I am not ready to be sacrificed at altar