Just, for the record, I do feel bad for being annoyed. idk why I'm like this. So I've spent years being my moms emotional support. It sucked having to be there for her since I was little, boyfriend after boyfriend, fits of depression after fits of depression, after constantly needing to validate her I just stopped. one night while I was comforting her while she was crying and I felt... nothing, just annoyance this was happening again. And the second time a friend called and told me about her bf who's in jail right now ( wont go into details) and she started crying and while I said all the sympathy stuff, apologies, agreeing that her parents suck bc they wont let her see his mom, I was just wishing she'd shut up. and now looking back there were a few times like this. It's a little blurry but I remember I was at a hotel (this was when I was little) we were going to see my grandma on my moms side and before we could get down to Florida she died. My mom was asking her sister if she should even still go down there. I piped up saying that we should. Not for grieving or anything like that, just because *I* wanted to. I barely even acknowledged what my mom was going through, didn't care about that. Maybe thats just kids being kids though. I still feel and care about what other people think, constantly making sure I don't say the wrong thing or make other people feel bad.. . it's just the crying part that just gets on my nerves. I hate that I feel like this and don't want to, I want to sympathize but just can't. there have been a few occasions I've felt nothing, to thinking about how there mood or whatever their crying about would effect me and things I want, to mild annoyance