My (29F) partner spends all of his (38M) time on his cellphone, whether it is scrolling Reddit, getting sucked into videos/Reels or debating strangers on the internet over things that don't affect him. Mostly politics, socioeconomic issues, or science based topics. I get many Reels shared with me on the daily. I also get many Reels shared with me when he's gone to the bathroom. I'm sick of it.

Don't get me wrong... I too am hooked on my phone. I use it too much. I feel the difference is that I have the ability to put it away in social situations where it might not be appropriate to scroll on your phone like you're trying to fill time.

My final straw today is yet another family visit where he spent the entire visit on his phone. A 1 day trip. 24 hours. I asked what his screen time was today so far (around 8pm)... It was 6+ hours. I've made remarks previously about this, especially when visiting people. It's embarrassing when someone is sitting next to you, at someone else's house, so engulfed in their phone that when you ask them a question they genuinely have no idea what is happening in the conversation. Or when you see them hold their phone up super close to their ear to listen to a Reel they just couldn't possibly wait for a more appropriate time for. Or when you're mid conversation and they interrupt to hold their phone up to your face to show you something unrelated without including the individual I was directly socializing with (my mom). Worst part? I gently nudge or make a comment about it and I feel like an jerk. All. Friggin. Day.

I kept trying to engage him in conversation and pull him away from his phone but you can only try to interrupt someone's phone time so many times before you truly just stop giving a shit. Is it really the best time to engage in deep Reddit discussions while you're visiting your girlfriend's family, that you only see maybe 3-4 times per year? Is this not the one circumstance where you can be polite, put your phone away and engage with the people who are trying to socialize with you? I don't know if he really realizes the impression that has.

He also complained about the music (he was "so sick of hearing yet another Coachella song"... We just had random music videos playing on the TV in the background), how tired he was, how he didn't want to come on a walk (with the 3 dogs WE brought/own... Which frick... That's another rabbit hole he's sent me down now that I'm here) and also that he, and I quote, "doesn't want say he doesn't want to be here right now but today is one of those days he would rather be at home relaxing".

Imagine your partner of ~3 years acting like you just dragged him to jury duty when it is 1 day of visiting your family. My family is pretty casual. Come when you want, stay as long as you want, eat, drink, bring your dog, cat, be merry, whatever. My parents are socially awkward and the type to go above and beyond to accommodate guests who may also be uncomfortable (I.e. As young teens we were never expected to eat dinner with the parents/family if friends were over, we could eat in the living room or elsewhere).

Pretty music all of his complaints were met with a potential remedy that he ignored and went back to his phone.

• You don't like the music? What would you like to hear? Connect your phone and put something on! no answer
• You don't want to walk the dogs this afternoon (there is 5 total with my parent's dogs)? Completely understand. You don't have to. This is fun for my sisters, mom, and I. proceeds to come anyway and complain about being sore/tired after
• You are tired? Go have a nap if you would like! There's a TV in the room you're staying in if you want to put something on. nope. rather stay awake and make everyone else gloomy.

I'm sick of feeling like a nag and don't know how to approach this anymore. He doesn't seem to see an issue with this behavior and I'm feeling incredibly frustrated. I'd rather he just stay home instead of coming and being a bump on a log. AITAH for drawing a hard line here and demanding more moderation of cellphone use going forward?