My sister and mom are planning a small bachelorette for me. They invited my mother in law and my mother in law told them she was about to reach out to them to make a plan! Plans are in place. The only problem is, she also invited my “sister in law” (lets call her Ashley). It wasn’t malicious, she just doesn’t know the situation and what Ashley did to me.

Background of the past: Ashley spreaded a nasty rumor about me before i got with my fiance and before she got with my fiancé’s brother. I get its the past, and you should “forgive” people, but i never forgive and forget. I will never be friends/close with someone who hurt me. I can act civilly around them, but they will never be my friend.

The present: During family get togethers, Ashley is “nice” to me. She compliments me, tries to start small talk, etc. but she never addressed the situation or apologized at all. I also act civilly around her during family gatherings, so If she talks to me, hugs me, i respond and hug back. BUT i keep it short and i never initiate anything with her, i dont talk to her first, i dont greet her first etc. i keep my distance. Shes the one who keeps approaching me. I do not let her presence ruin my good time during family gatherings. The reason why i act civilly is because i don’t want any drama and i don’t want it to affect my fiancé’s relationship with his brother. No one else knew what she did to me aside from fiance. I also made a boundary that i will never spend time with her alone and that the only time i will see her is during gatherings. I dont plan to attend her bachelorette, i dont want anything to do with her.

I dont want to make myself uncomfortable to make others comfortable. It is my bachelorette and i want to have a good time.

Wibtah if i told my mother in law i Dont want Ashley coming to my bachelorette and to tell her what Ashely did to me in the past?