I am an aunty to a wonderful young adult (19) who is Autistic and Transgender, we'll call them YA. They are being bullied by their mothers' partner (Sis and Thing). Thing threw a bucket at YA, has aimed wine corks at them and thought the appropriate time for a jump scare was when YA was putting a dish into a hot oven. After YA repeatedly communicated boundaries, Sis and Thing bulldozed them and sis told YA that they are over-reacting. Sometimes Sis would tell Thing off, then tell YA that they are the one over-reacting. Thing would only do this when Sis was around. When she wasn't, Thing either ignored YA or stared at them like YA has not right to even exist. There are many other incidents but y'all get the picture. Sis does not recognise YA's chosen gender identity, and constantly deadnames them, and gets angry at anyone who does respect and recognise it. YA often vents to me as I recognise and respect them, and treat them with kindness, understanding and support. 3 years ago, YA was eligible for the Disability Support Pension, but it was never acted upon by Sis. For 4 years, YA was eligible for the National Disability Insurance Scheme (support worker, psychology, etc.) but Sis always said 'too much paperwork! They told me to apply online, but I don't do ANYTHING online!'. Approximately a month ago, after another argument, YA left home and went to stay with friends. I'm so happy to know they are safe, supported, and understood. YA is thriving there, and I keep in close contact to help them get ID documents, income, permanent residence, etc. Sis would call YA 2 or 3 times a day but they would not answer as they were too scared of being yelled at yet again. YA would reply by text and asked to communicate by text for the time being. Sis doesn't text.... she refuses. As YA would only communicate by text, not voice, Sis got fed up. YA's phone was under Sis name, so she had the Sim card cloned, then disconnected. No warning, no notice, nothing. As soon as she told me that, I told her that was a stupid move and hung up. This past week, YA arranged to collect their belongings including ID such as birth certificate and requested no-one be home at the time. Sis refused and remained there while YA grabbed their stuff. YA had arranged for a police escort as they didn't feel safe there for at least 2 years. The police couldn't even get Sis to hand over the documents. That day, I was at work in a meeting when Sis messaged me asking for 'Deadnames' new mobile number. My response was that I don't feel comfortable giving out (YA's name) phone number without their approval, and thought that was that. Boy was I wrong!!! My mother rang me a few hours later to have a go at me for calling YA by his chosen name (Sis told YA's grandparents about their gender identity, without YA's ok), and that if I didn't back off, my sister would go no contact. I yelled at my mum that I'd rather that than lose YA permanently, as that is the path that they are on. YA does come and stay with my husband and I for a few days each fortnight, and I take them to do some volunteer work, which they love. Sadly, they will need to take a break from that soon as a background check is due and he has almost no ID to complete it. I feel like I'm advocating for a vulnerable young adults rights, and my family is being torn apart because of it...... Am I the A..hole?