My girlfriend (23F) and I (23M) have been together for a year. We have a solid relationship—we communicate well and usually handle disagreements respectfully.

I have a close friend who’s never been in a relationship and has shared with me that he feels insecure about it. I told my girlfriend about this in a normal, honest way—not to insult him, just as part of many things we talk about.

A few days ago, she came to my class and saw him leaving (they didn’t even talk). Later, she started bringing him up randomly in conversations. For example, while talking about someone else, she said: “she is as tall as your friend.” Then last night she said: “he feels like he is the shit right? I am sure he feels like he is the coolest or what not.” I asked her why she thought that, and she said: “I don't know, he did not fit in the desperate guy description you gave me about him.”

That made me feel off. So I told her I thought it was inappropriate to judge him based on a glance, especially when she hadn’t spoken to him. I also told her it felt like she was overly interested in his business and was making assumptions based on things I shared in confidence.

She got upset and now we’re not talking.

I’m wondering if I was too harsh by calling her out like that. I didn’t yell or insult her—I just expressed that her comments felt disrespectful to me and unfair to my friend.