I (26F) was seeing this guy (27M) for about 6 months. We met through friends, hit it off quick, and started dating pretty much right after. He was super charming, really attentive, and actually seemed emotionally available. So yeah, I thought I’d found one of the rare good ones.

We weren’t super public online, but he told me he was private and didn’t like posting stuff. Honestly, I didn’t think much of it.

At first, nothing felt weird. But after a while, some stuff didn’t add up. He was always busy on weekends, never let me come to his place, always came to mine. Once, I tagged him in a story and he immediately texted me to take it down. Said his job didn’t like personal stuff online or whatever. I started getting that gut feeling.

So, yeah... I did some digging. I don’t even know what I was looking for, I just needed peace of mind. And that’s when I found her.

His actual girlfriend. Of over three years.

Everything made sense instantly. All the weekends he was “working,” all the last-minute plan cancellations. I thought he was cheating on me with another girl. Turns out I was the other girl the entire time. He was cheating on her with me.

I felt disgusted. I had no clue. I legit thought we were building something real.

So I messaged her. Sent her everything. Screenshots. Pics. The whole ugly truth. She was shocked and devastated, obviously. We actually talked for a while and it was heartbreaking how similar our experiences were. It was like he was copy-pasting lies to both of us.

After that, I posted the whole thing online. Didn’t drop names, but people figured it out fast. I just wanted to warn others and honestly, I felt so used and embarrassed I needed to take some power back.

Well. It blew up. People were pissed. He lost a bunch of friends, his real girlfriend dumped him, and now he’s telling people I’m the one who ruined his life. Says I “humiliated” him and crossed a line by going public.

Some mutual friends think I went too far and should’ve just let it go after telling her. Others say he got exactly what he deserved.

So yeah. AITA?