There was a time when I felt something for this guy. It started with a dream—random, out of nowhere—but it left a warmth that lingered. After that, I started noticing him more. The way he talked, how he carried himself… I felt genuinely drawn to him.

But I pushed it away. I didn’t want to get distracted, so I buried those feelings. I started acting like I didn’t care, maybe even ignoring him too much, hoping it would fade.

He noticed. And at some point, it felt like he was trying to make me jealous. Subtle things—talking loudly around me, being extra with others when I was nearby. And I won’t lie—it worked. I did feel something. I just never admitted it out loud.

Now he’s in a relationship.

But even after that… it was like he still saw me. I’d catch him gazing at me in class—long stares that felt like they went right through me. Not just quick glances, but the kind that made my chest tighten. Like he was trying to say something without words. Whenever we crossed the paths tension between us was undeniable.

I don’t want to interfere, I’d never do that. I'm not that type of woman who could third wheel someone. But there’s this ache I can’t shake. A regret that I didn’t let myself feel things when it mattered. And now, it’s just a bunch of quiet “what ifs” I carry around. It's been year now I am not longer in academy but I'd still get dreams of us behaving like couple around and sometimes even getting married to him. (I really don't want that dreams)

I want to fade his face from my memories.

Has anyone else gone through something like this?