Me (f) and my bf were together for 3 years. He’s the kind of guy who doesn’t really talk to girls not very noticeable in class just super shy. In the beginning he wouldn’t even speak to me properly. He didn’t know anything about girls or relationships and honestly, I found that really cute (I was in love, okay?!).

The first year was amazing — full-on honeymoon phase. He spoiled me with gifts, outings, was super understanding… and then came the tornado.

We started fighting constantly and mostly over the same 4 issues:

1. He plays badminton in the evenings and says he’ll come back to chat. That’s the only time we talk in a day for like 1-2 hours. But he never shows up on time and I end up staying up late and sacrificing my sleep. (And we’re in India (Chennai), so calling regularly isn’t much of an option.)

2. When he’s angry, he just says anything stuff that’s way too personal things I’ve only told him in confidence. No filter. No respect.

3.Every time we go out I wait for him at the bus station for like an hour. Every. Single. Time.

1. He forgets every single shit he remembers the anniversary and my birthday that's it and even in the 1st yr he wasn't sure whether it's 25th or 26th. Spoiler alert it's 25th

We kept fighting about these same things. For two years. I’d try to explain how I felt he’d promise to change… and then he wouldn’t. His “sorrys” were always followed by “but you shouldn’t have done this” or “you’re misunderstanding me.” Never really took accountability.

Still, I kept forgiving him. Over and over.

And then recently, he said something like “you don’t care about me enough — I’m the man in this relationship” (yes, I’m a girl, lol). I cried, and he hit me with the classic “this isn’t even a big fight, why are you crying?”

Guess what? I forgave him. Again.

But the final straw was our sexual life. We’re virgins but have talked about intimacy. He’s not okay with the idea of asking before getting intimate like, I don’t expect a formal permission slip but even just checking in with a “hey you good?” after touching me would mean so much. I had to make a big deal out of it for him to even understand it’s important.

And here’s the thing: I’m a SA survivor. So all of this asking, consent, aftercare it’s not just important, it’s essential. I’ve told him this. I’ve asked him to learn. He just… doesn’t.

So yeah, I ended things. And now it’s 4am, and I’m crying myself to sleep. Just wondering… AITA?

And I request not to post this anywhere since this is a throwaway account