I (18F) had a close friendship with my (former?) best friend A (18F). We are part of a larger friend group, which also includes her best friend E (18F), and the three of us spent a lot of time together. But now everything is ruined, and I don’t know if it’s my fault.

It started last year when A told me that she and our mutual friend B had a thing for each other, but she didn’t want anything serious with him. A little later, I developed a crush on him and sent her a voice message (she was away from home for a while) asking if she would be okay with me trying to see if something could happen between me and B. I made it clear that our friendship was way more important to me than any guy and that I would drop it immediately if she was uncomfortable. She got really angry because she said it was already bad enough that I even had the thought. We had a huge fight but eventually made up. E said she understood both sides but, of course, sided with her best friend (which I get).

Then, A, E, and I went to another city together and stayed at a friend’s place. Another friend (C) was there too, and A found him attractive. She was flirting with another friend of our host, so I ended up talking to C. But A saw it as me flirting with him, which I didn’t do (at least not intentionally) and got mad at me (although I didnt know about that till today). Later, I mentioned that I found D (a guy from our skate community whom she had a thing with) attractive. At first, she said she couldn’t see herself in a relationship with him and even thought he would be a better fit for me. She was unsure, though, because she still liked him. Later, she told me this was one of the reasons why she ended our friendship. I did try flirting with him once (which was actually her idea), but I quickly realized he wasn’t interested, so I dropped it immediately. Today she told me that the way I acted in those 3 situations wasnt okay. I sometimes have difficulties reading social cues so im not sure if I missed something back then

A little while ago, we had a conversation with her best friend E, where they told me the things about me that bothered them so we could find solutions. One of the main issues was that I sometimes say or do things without thinking. I apologized and explained that this is due to my ADHD, but I’m actively working on it and never do it on purpose. They pointed out other issues as well, which I also acknowledged and had already been trying to improve. I understand that these things affected them, and I get why they needed space.

Then A told me she needed space from me. I accepted that. But yesterday, I went skating and sat down with two people I knew—F and G. The problem: F is A’s crush. I asked them if I could sit with them because I didn’t want to sit alone. They didn’t mind, and F even started some conversations with me. We only made small talk and talked about skating. Other than that, I was reading or skating. Still, the next morning, A told me that there would be serious drama if I didn’t stay away from F. Later that night, she said I should stop going to the skatepark altogether and that if I said anything more than “hi” to F or G, there would be even bigger issues. She also told me not to come near her anymore—“for my own good.”

Now, I feel completely broken. She was one of my best friends. We’re in the same class and friend group, and now everything is destroyed. I know I made mistakes, but I feel like she’s being extremely controlling, especially when it comes to guys. At the same time, I’m scared that this is just a defense mechanism on my part and that I’m actually the one at fault.

So, AITA?