All of this started about half a year ago. My brother and I share an apartment. We moved out of our mother's apartment about five years ago with the support of our father, who agreed to rent the apartment with us. The reason for this was that at the time I was doing an apprenticeship and therefore only earned a small amount of money. And my brother was self-employed, which meant he had no steady income. Both of these were a red flag for the landlord. My father rented the apartment for us because he earned a lot of money as a police superintendent. We paid for everything by transferring the money to him, but he was registered as the main tenant. And I transferred €600 a month to my brother for food shopping, because it was easier than taking turns paying for the shopping all the time.

At some point, we moved house with the same arrangement. Since I had completed my training by then, I was now earning significantly more money. And when my father retired last year, all contracts were transferred to my account. Electricity, gas, rent, internet and pretty much all other bills were now paid by me, since my brother was still self-employed and had no steady income. My brother managed to persuade me that if I simply transferred him less money each month for shopping, this would reflect his share of these costs and since he pays taxes and insurance himself, we would be paying the same. And that sounded plausible to me at first, which is why I agreed. However, he didn't pay a cent for the grocery shopping because it was all deducted from the monthly €600. This means that the only costs he now bears are the monthly grocery purchases. And even the taxes and insurance that he has to pay as part of his self-employment are not considered living expenses and therefore cannot be counted as “equivalent” costs, since he would have to pay them anyway if he lived alone.

My father then said that he felt that my brother was taking advantage of me financially, but I told him that we were helping each other. I had no problem covering the costs. Until last month, when I had to pay a large back tax bill as part of my tax return. At the same time, my brother received a huge tax refund. We are talking about a four-digit amount that could easily have covered my back tax payment. But instead of even considering helping me, I, who no longer knew where he would get the money for the tax, had to watch my brother buy a new PC. In the end, I was able to pay the tax because my mother lent me the money.

And I finally had enough. My father was on my side in this matter and said that I should not let myself be taken advantage of and he helped me look for a place to live on my own. My brother was furious. He told me that I was abandoning him, that I was being selfish, and that he had done so much for me that I knew nothing about. When I asked him what he had done for me, he had no answer. He accused me of wanting to make him homeless. So AITA?