I am a Hispanic immigrant and when I was 8 y/o I came to the US with my mom and brother (then 38 and 14). Soon after that, my mother started seeing a guy a couple of years younger than her and since then they have been in an on-and-off relationship. It’s important to know that my mom met this guy as the son of a friend of hers when she would go to work at night and he had just gotten out of prison for drug possession and intent of selling. During this time they would fight nonstop to the point of violence. Let’s just say many restraining orders were put in place and all were violated or taken off.

My mom has told one life-changing lie after the other. I won’t go into detail but it involves court, police reports, and lying to CPS. She has lied about being pregnant and saying she lost the baby one way or another so you can see why I would be skeptical of her saying she’s pregnant. As I got older I realized that my mom is a pathological liar, a narcissist, and sometimes neglectful. Now I’m 17 and recently came back from staying at a relative’s when I overheard my mom (47) talking on the phone about being “pregnant” something she hasn’t explicitly stated to me. Since then she has gone all out telling everyone that she’s “pregnant” and even buying prenatal vitamins and baby stuff.

However, my relative and I expressed concern to each other about her actually being pregnant and my living conditions. For context, we live in a small rented house with 2 1/2 bedrooms, one of those being where our dogs sleep, it doesn’t help that we move around a lot and my mom has a low-income job. In other words, she has little to no resources to support a baby and I wouldn’t have much faith in the baby’s father (the guy) since he’s prone to use drugs at any given moment as he has done over the years and gone to prison for multiple times for. I’ve also heard my mother say multiple times that if anything she’ll leave the baby to my brother (soon to be 23) something which he’s also not financially stable for.

Ultimately I know that she’ll want me to help take care of the baby by expressing her disdain towards me getting a job. I fear that the kid will go through the same emotional childhood trauma as me since I know the relationship between my mother and the guy is unstable and a toxic endless cycle. I’m at the point of graduating high school and plan on going to college and can’t afford to put my goals on pause because my mother wanted to have a baby when her youngest child is almost 18. I’ve kept my thoughts to myself and haven’t comment anything because I know I would be painted as the villain for it. She has an ultrasound at the end of the month so only then will I believe it and in retrospect, I think the baby would have a better life if she gave it up when it’s born because knowing what I went through it would be the best choice to make. So am I the asshole for believing that my mom isn’t pregnant and that she should give the baby up if she is.