To begin, let me 56f mention that (let’s call her) Steph has been a part of my life since I was around 8 yo. She’s the mother of my little brother, 39, (let’s call him) Mike who is married and has three kids. The year before last, I paid for Mike’s family and myself to go to Disney. Steph kept talking about how jealous she was. After we returned, she kept talking about how she’d love to go. She asked me how much I thought she’d have to save to go. I said I didn’t know because I used a planner and didn’t plan for one, only six and there wasn’t room for another person in our hotel. Well this year, we went again. And it all started over again. A few months before the trip, my other SIL even asked why I never invited Steph. I basically said I’m already paying for six, I’m not paying for seven. My SIL replied that Steph would pay her own way. I then said well this is something I want to do with just them.

Here’s what gets me. Steph has only offered to pay for herself while I’m paying for everyone else. Plus nobody (Mike, his wife, the kids, me) really wants her to go. I don’t know how many times I can keep telling her no without an explanation before I turn into an AH. Honestly I don’t feel I owe them a justification, but they are her grandkids. Am I being an AH?

Side note: The trips aren’t cheap. But I’m not wealthy. The money comes from a rental property I sold which was originally willed to my niece and nephews. So it’s their inheritance that’s paying for it.