I (F29) was engaged to my ex (M35) for one month before I pressed charges and filed a civil complaint for $20,000.

Before him, I was engaged to the father of my child (FOC). When that ended, I kept the ring and occasionally wore it because it was beautiful and had sentimental value—it was custom-made, and I hoped to pass it down to my daughter. I was even wearing it the day I met my now ex. I explained its significance, and he didn’t seem to mind at the time.

About a year into our relationship, we got serious. I wore the ring to special events, but he started making snide comments. I’d jokingly reply, “I’ll stop wearing it when you buy me a better one.” From the beginning, I was clear that I wanted marriage and more kids—I wasn’t dating for fun. Out of respect for his feelings, I eventually stopped wearing the ring, even though he asked why I didn’t just sell it. I told him I wanted to keep it for my daughter.

Fast forward another year—he took me to Thailand and proposed with a beautiful 5-carat radiant cut diamond ring. When we returned home, I noticed my original ring was missing. I asked him about it, and he admitted he had exchanged it to help pay for the new one. I was devastated. We went back to the jeweler, but it had sold within an hour. I asked for the buyer’s info, but they couldn’t provide it. I felt like a part of me had died.

I packed up myself and my daughter and stayed with my mom while I sorted out my thoughts. I was furious. My mom and the FOC were both upset; my dad, on the other hand, thought I was overreacting. I spoke with my ex, expressing how betrayed I felt and explaining the emotional value of the ring. He dismissed my feelings and said it was “weird” and “disrespectful” that I was so attached to a symbol of a past relationship.

That’s when I knew we couldn’t come back from this. I talked to a lawyer who said I could sue for the value of the ring and emotional damages, but I’d need to press theft charges to have a valid case. I didn’t want to at first—I still loved him and hoped he’d try to make it right. But his complete lack of remorse made the decision clear.

We went to civil court, and I was awarded $20,000—the value of my original ring and the one he gave me (which totaled $42,000). Once the judgment was made, I dropped the criminal charges, but the relationship was over. That part hurt.

I loved him and wish things could’ve turned out differently. My mom, the FOC, and some friends support my decision. But my dad and others think I overreacted and that suing him was extreme. Now I’m stuck wondering: did I do the right thing, or am I the asshole?