Hey.

When I met my friend and his friends a few years ago it was under the context of doing things like going out late at night, drinking, and so on. Normal activities would be more rare.

Some time into the friendship I started to change my lifestyle to be more day oriented and I quit drinking and using substances. I also never go out late at night nor ever really stay up.

My friend and his friends aren’t respecting my desire to no longer join them in these things over and over. I’ve communicated many times and still get pressured and have my life choices questioned. Each conversation is painted to make me seem like I don’t care about my friend or his friends (I care about him, not his friends anymore, we still connect but just have grown to have different lifestyles). I’m made to seem like the inconsiderate asshole who would “make it work” for a friend.

I’m tired of the pressure, the anxiety, the dread. I hate being with them and don’t feel like myself. It’s draining. Am I wrong, a dick? I’ve tried explaining again and again but even when there seemed to be some agreement, the pressure and condescension would just continue. I’m done explaining. I hate doing night things and shouldn’t have to explain my disdain for hanging out.

Can someone also tell me if I should do a direct confrontation regarding this behavior and reality or whether I should just do a low to no contact approach. Seems to me a low contact approach will just end in confrontation anyway.

Thanks!

Edit: One more detail. Part of why this is hard for me is that we’ve grown very close other the few years and I feel like I just move on or distance myself that easily. It certainly can’t be done like in other situations where you just fade away because you weren’t that close.