Hi everyone, I (34F) lost my husband, Mark (37M), in a car accident two months ago, and things with his family have gotten complicated since.

It was sudden and utterly devastating—he was my best friend, and we’d built a life together with our two kids (ages 4 and 6). In the weeks after his funeral, while sorting through his desk drawer, I found a small, leather-bound journal he kept under lock and key. Curious and grieving, I read it—and discovered he’d poured out things he never said aloud: his lifelong anxiety, guilt over a mistake he made long before we met, private hopes for our family’s future, and even regrets about how distant he’d felt during my last pregnancy. It broke my heart and also made me feel closer to him in that painful way.

Because the pages were so raw and personal, I locked the journal away in our safe. I promised myself I’d only read it again when I could brace myself emotionally—and certainly never share it. It felt like his one remaining space of privacy where he spoke to himself, not to anyone else.

Last weekend, Mark’s mom and siblings came over for dinner. Halfway through, his sister Sarah (34F) put her hand on the safe and said, “We know you have his journal. We want to read parts of it at his memorial next month—he’d want us to celebrate all sides of him.” Mark’s mom added, voice trembling, “He was our son too. You can’t just keep his memories locked away from the family.”

I tried to explain that I wasn’t hiding anything malicious—it was simply his private thoughts, and I’d promised him I’d honor his privacy. My mother-in-law lost it and accused me of “controlling his legacy” and “keeping the truth from everyone who loved him.” Sarah chimed in that I was selfish for denying them that “closure.”

I ended up standing my ground: the journal stays locked. They stormed off angry, calling me heartless. My own mother (who’s been my rock) thinks I’m doing the right thing, and my therapist agrees that sharing someone’s private writings against their will breaches trust, even after death.

I’m torn—of course I want my in-laws to heal, but it feels like betrayal to expose Mark’s most vulnerable thoughts to a public audience. AITA for protecting his privacy and refusing to hand over the journal?