My sister has three sons: 6, 4, and 2 years old. They often argue with each other, which is pretty normal at that age.

Today, the 6-year-old and 4-year-old were at our place. The 4-year-old had built a LEGO bridge earlier with their grandpa. The oldest brought his large remote-controlled car and wanted to drive it under the bridge, but the bridge would broke. The 4-year-old got mad and kicked the car away, and then the 6-year-old hit him.

I was in my room when it happened, but came out when I heard the 4-year-old crying and screaming. My mom was sitting with the oldest and told me that the 4-year-old had kicked the car first, so that’s why the 6-year-old reacted. I got really annoyed that she immediately took one child’s side instead of staying neutral. She was talking in front of the kids.

My dad tried to point out that the 6-year-old still hit the 4-year-old, but my mom kept defending the oldest, saying it was the 4-year-old’s fault for kicking the car. I understand both of them did something wrong, but now the 4-year-old was screaming and refusing to talk. Later, I told my mom (Not in front of the kids, of course) that as an adult, she shouldn’t take sides, especially when both kids were in the wrong. She told me to be quiet and insisted it was all the 4-year-old’s fault.

This really triggered me because she used to do the same thing when we were kids — always taking my older sister’s side. Now she’s doing the same thing with my sister’s kids. I feel like adults should stay neutral in these situations and help kids understand what they both did wrong.

Since the middle child was just screaming and not calming down, we called my sister so he could talk to his mom. During the call, my mom tried to tell her that it was entirely the middle child’s fault and that he started everything.

I texted my sister and told her that both of the kids were in the wrong, and that I thought it was unfair of our mom to take sides — she should’ve stayed neutral. But my sister is the type of person who believes you should always respect your elders, no matter what.

Personally, I think that kind of mindset only creates problems between siblings. Sometimes you have to speak up — even if it’s against your own mom.

I get that the 6-year-old is easier to talk to and the 4-year-old can be more defiant and tends to scream instead of talk. But still, I don’t think it’s okay to clearly take one kid’s side like that.

AITAH for speaking up?