I’m a teen (f16) and my dad had never really been in my life until around 2 years ago. I’m Afro Latina. He is heavily Christian (specifically JW) and now ig so is my mom. My mother used to be my best friend, ever since he came in the picture she is not. We used to go to church and whatever before him, she used to let me hangout with my friends and have fun. I barely go anywhere or hangout with friends now. It was a fight to let me go to hoco. He talks to her like an animal and bosses her around. I used to be into the spiritual life but him and his forcefulness took that light out of me. I really don’t like him, and I have never wanted a relationship with him. My mom knows that. He has money or whatever. So I go along with it, because she says to. He makes us fly out to Florida to see him, and it always stresses me out. It’s Florida and he doesn’t allow me to wear shorts. He always makes us go meet whoever he wants. We don’t get to choose where we go. He bosses us around and always always always thinks he’s right. He’s not. No matter how many times I explained it’s hurtful that he sexualizes me like that he doesn’t get it. It’s like being a trophy with nothing to do. So whatever now my mom makes us do a Bible study and I’ve been trying to do it trying to be a good daughter; yk do that they say. But I’m sick and tired of it. I’m tired of him and I’m honestly done. He has told lies to my grandmother about me causing me to be dragged down the stairs by my hair and have my face smashed into the wall. She didn’t know the real story. He just calls her to complain. He actually had talked crap about my grandmother in front of me and that was the reason why I was acting indifferent towards him. I’m not a touchy person, only really with people I’ve known since childhood. He doesn’t like that I won’t really hug him, and he thinks it’s funny to joke about hitting me. Sorry back to the Bible study. I was recently studying for AP gov and I’m really stressed about it the test is like may sum. I spent all day doing my homework for other classes. 3 projects and a test to do over the weekend. I was studying and explained to her that I don’t feel smart enough to pass and that I’m really concerned about it. My father says that god is more important because school isn’t going to bring me anywhere. It’s a dumb mindset and I’ll never believe it. I say whatever and start the study with them. Halfway through I just started crying and didn’t want to continue. I told her that and explained that I really don’t like him. She wants me to try because he is my father. I don’t see the need to. The more you know about the Bible the more you don’t want to know. Bible studies don’t stimulate me and I feel like it’s never anything new. I immediately felt guilty and told her I was sorry and that we could continue. He got mad and started berating her saying that it’s the devil. I’ve been called the devil multiple times by my family members. It’s whatever tough skin haha. Always I felt so guilty so I apologized and told her we can do the study and go to church all that. She’s still upset and was crying last night even though she said she was not mad at me. I tried to comfort her despite being sad myself and told her I was sorry. I slept with her like we used to when I was a kid and talked to her. We went to church this morning and we sat in her bed talking about nails. We have a wedding to go to and I need a dress. I’m always last thought of. She won’t allow me to go to the mall with her and everyone else. I can’t choose my own dress now, and I’m stuck at home. I feel like crap, there’s nothing I can do.