I’ve never made a story on here so please bear with me I need the advice I (14f) and my mom (47F) have been doing foster care for only 2 years, we’ve been offered many kids but we denied most due to the being to young to be trusted in my or my brother’s (15M) care, we’ve had 4 kids live in our house, at some point all at once, I want to keep names anonymous because I don’t want anymore drama in case they find this. The youngest J (10F) her older sister S(11F) and a girl from a different family Z(13F). J and S were the first kids we fostered, they had come from different countries after being separated, at first I saw no problem and it was going really well but me and S never really connected because I had a weird feeling about her. We were happy with the kids and we were thinking of adopting them. After some time Z came, me and her clicked immediately due to our age and similar personalities. After some time I started to notice that Z had a very bad attitude at times, nothing crazy but she would talk back to my mother and she wouldn’t listen if I told her she couldn’t do some things. One day my mom had cooked us all dinner but she decided she didn’t want to and that she was gonna fry some chicken, she didn’t know what she was doing so I told her we’ll have to ask my mom or just eat the door and snacks we had and I’ll make some tomorrow, she insisted and got in trouble, my mom didn’t yell but she was irritated because it was late at night, they went back and forth for a bit but after some time Z gave up and went to call her sister (her older sister who refused custody for her weird boyfriend) and talk about my mom. We started to notice things going missing and after searching for days S began to blame Z, I didn’t want to believe it until I found my headphones wrapped in her cover and J’s tablet in her bag. We confronted Z and she got mad and ended up running away to her sister’s house. I was at my dad’s house at the time. After I came home I got the news from my mom and she told me Z had said some pretty harsh things about me, usually these things don’t bother me but I never expected from her. She ended up on a national missing kid thing, and her grandmother went to jail for housing her. I just want to mention, the entire time S was very quiet and usually ignored me and J and slept in my mom’s bed. Since the start S had connected with my mom and she would even wear the same thing as my mom, it hurt seeing my mother being taken away but I thought it was normal for foster kids, but my mom started calling her nicknames she’s been calling me since I was in diapers, they’d even mock me about being jealous. The connection between me and my mom started to fall apart and S was taunting me about it, I tried telling my mom it was seriously not funny but she made jokes and sent me off. we continue searching for J’s tablet to no luck, one day before school I was looking through S’s backpack to confirm a suspicious that had been nagging me for a while in the back I found J’s tablet and a few of my things, drawing, jewelry, and one of my hoodies. I told my mom and she talked to S and nothing changed. My mom only got fed up when S had put paint in the toothpaste and began to bully J and just be down right disrespectful to my face, no more sly comments. The entire time they had been going to therapy and S had been telling everyone lies about her diagnosis for sympathy, this caused everyone to walk up to me in the halls and ask questions and some of my friends stopped talking to me to talk to her. J wast my best friend but she wasn’t perfect either she would all ways talk back and talk about hurting people or even our animals, so my mom sent both of them off. I thought that was the end of it but my mom tried to take in a 16 year old boy, C. I wasn’t comfortable with this and when I voiced it. I was called selfish for not wanting to give up my room, that’s wasn’t the case, I just didn’t want this guy 2 years from 18 living with me and most of the time me and him would be alone because my mom has work and my brother would commonly go with my other siblings to their houses. Both my mom and brother called me selfish and sexist, I finally caved and we met him. He was nice but after all that my mom denied him for an unknown reason. Now we have a 4 year old boy with down syndrome and autism. He’s a lot of work and I’m doing most of it (like usual), even after I told my mom I’m done with it and I have to be able to focus on school and myself, cleaning up after him, making him food and something changing his diapers. I’m starting to flunk classes because I’m not able to study, or do homework I’m also very tired from the day before because he doesn’t sleep until about 12 and my mom is usually sleep. My mom doesn’t listen and I feel like I have no one to talk to. Im really sorry for the long story, I tried to shorten it by as much as I could, I just need to know (update) thank you for the comments I just wanted to give some more information on me and my parents relationships. Me and my mom are constantly arguing but when she started foster care it’s calmed down before foster care my mom would constantly tell me i should move in with my dad but i always refused even if it’s a better fit, because im sure if I move out my mom with cut contact and break off my relationships with my cousins. I don’t want to tell any counselors because I don’t want any extra drama and I also dang have time due to making up missing work, plus I don’t really feel comfortable talking to my counselor because I’m not sure if they’ll tell my parents, I know that’s not supposed to happen but my last counselor did call my mom a few time to tell her what I had said in an effort to “mend our relationship”. I love my dad but I don’t want to live with him because my mom would take this all to court and I don’t want to have to go through that again. Thank you for the advice, I’m gonna take some time to think about it and maybe I’ll talk to the counselor because it seems like what’s best.