I'm 37 male, my sister is 41. I can't tell you what industry she is in or any of those details.

I can say that she dislikes her job environment and feels it is detrimental to her life as a mom. She is the primary earner in her household. She feels insecure about not having a college degree and, in general, assumes she cannot make a lateral career move. She thinks a job change would require a 40% pay reduction and she would have to start over to try and move up again. She does think that the perfect opportunity may reveal itself, and she could change jobs while avoiding the retaliation detailed below.

My sister is convinced that she would be immediately fired, and completely blacklisted from her industry, in retaliation for seeking new employment. She has said, "I know that's supposed to be illegal, but I'm not going to go through the ordeal of getting a lawyer and going to court." She has stated that she "has seen this happen to other people" in her industry.

She is in a position now, from her point of view, where she is forced to continue working this job that she dislikes because seeking employment would put her on unemployment until she finds a job that pays 40% less. She has discussed this "situation" with us, her immediate family, nearly every time we've been together over the past 5 years.

In that time, over the past years, I have expressed total disbelief in her accounting of the situation. It sounds ridiculous and I strongly believe she is building a mental prison in which she can divest from herself responsibility. Everything is outside of her control and she must live this life she dislikes because there's no other option.

With all that being said, I accept that I cannot change her point if view. However I can still offer advice. She cries, lashes out with anger, goes into depressive moods, and has anxiety symptoms like chest pains on a regular basis. It is hard to watch, and harder still to know that she is in some sense wasting these years of her life. She is an excellent mother, a good friend, and a fun sister at times, but there can be no doubt that she is getting less out of life than she could otherwise be getting.

So I want to help. No matter what, she is family and I will give my advice in the hopes that it can help.

Now, what happened over the weekend. The course of conversation was something like this:

Me: "Are you on LinkedIn?"

Her: "No, I would never do that."

Me: "You never know who could reach out to you, you might get an opportunity you've never considered."

Her: "I'm not comfortable with it."

Me: "What does that mean?"

Her: "I will NEVER have a LinkedIn account! (raised voice now) I don't do social media and I will not mix my career and social media. You live your life the way you want to, and if you're comfortable with it then you do it but I will never!"

Me: "I've never made a post on LinkedIn."

Her: ...

Me: "I've never made a post on LinkedIn. I don't understand what you're saying. There's nothing to be uncomfortable about."

Her: (long and continuous tirade, full yelling, veins popping out, red face. In front of our family and her children. She has to provide for her children and she can't afford to lose money and I don't know anything about her industry and she'll never, NEVER use LinkedIn, PERIOD END OF STORY)

Me: "If you're telling me that you're afraid to create a LinkedIn profile, then I'm sorry but that's a ridiculous position to have."

At this point our parents are telling me to drop it, telling me that I need to stop talking. But my sister is yelling overtop of everything.

Her: "This is why I hate talking to you all about my life. You can't accept that I know my own career, that I know my industry. I don't need you to talk to me. I don't want to talk to you anymore, ever."

Me: "You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to. I just don't understand what your issue is with LinkedIn."

Parents chime in again telling me to stop talking.

Me: "I'm just having a conversation."

Mom: "No you're not, you're telling her how to live her life. You're instigating this whole thing."

Me: "I'm being cordial and having a conversation."

Sister: "This is done, shut your mouth. You're done. Shut it." (like I'm her child)

Me: "[Sister], I want you to know that I forgive you."

Sister: "Fuck. You." (some real venom on this one)

Sister: "I'm done, we're done. [Niece], [Nephew], go say goodbye to your uncle."

I hugged the kids, but we still had to clean up some of the dinner so I helped do that with my brother in law. It had been about another 15 minutes and I was ready to leave. I said goodbye to everyone and when I got to my sister I said "Well... On this day we celebrate Jesus coming back to life, from the dead. If he can do that, we can manage to say goodbye to one another." I gave her a hug and she was staring at me with real hatred in her expression. It definitely took me aback, but she's family so I wasn't going to give up on her.

I'm going to respect what she said and if she doesn't want to talk to me anymore then I'm not going to reach out to her. Maybe that's the last time we'll have spoken, I don't know. I'm pretty drained from the whole ordeal. I was pretty sad last night, just have to see how it goes I guess.

-This is a throwaway account because I have personal information on my profile