Hello, recently just broken things off with an ex due to him constantly taking advantage of everything I do for him. I don't know I feel horrible for even thinking this but I've been thinking about deleting his game accounts for revenge, the shit he's done too me is too much. The amount of effort, money, time, and self respect I've sacrificed just to make him happy. This man blames me for the fact that he has wondering eyes and bloody porn addiction, had the audacity to tell me I've sacrificed nothing for him. Had the bloody audacity to walk away whenever I cry or hold him accountable, had the bloody audacity to punch me in the eye after I asked him if we could talk about what I'm feeling and he said yes and then a minute later gets in game with his friends and keeps getting angry at me when I practically begged him to stop for a moment and finally listen to me(I apologized to his friends after for disturbing their game and even they sided on me that it's just a game and they won't mind it if he went afk). It took me months to wake up because I was bloody I love with this man. I've endured everything, I've endured a d sacrificed so much for a misogynistic, porn addicted asshole.

Now back on topic, I've spend about nearly 10k php pesos or more in his games alone mostly from me trying to make up to him whenever he gets upset or when I know he wants something. And mind you most of the time when he gets upset it's usually from me being upset first and then a few minutes later it's like everything that I've felt gets pushed aside because he's offended of what I tell him. This mad walks out everytime I get vonurable. I've paid for dates, heck I even paid for his clinic visit just so he can obtain an excuse letter to take a special exam because this asshole went back to sleep instead of going to the venue(I paid for the taxi and clinic mind you but he's already paid me for the clinic visit) I don't know, I just wanna get into equal grounds. I know deleting his acc is too much, this is just probably me coping and want him to hurt as much as he's hurt me. I don't know, I didn't use to be like this. I actually hate the thought of deleting his account because it's just not me, but part of me really just wants him to also be as miserable as I am. I really really hate him everything he's done to me is too much already, ofcourse there are a few parts in this story that I haven't shared because I really don't feel comfortable sharing them and it feels too hurtful to share everything he's done because I feel like he's made me think that every horrible things he's done to me is what I deserved. I'm really sorry for ranting this long, I really need an advice please.