Me (25f) and my husband (24m) have been married for 3 months but had dated for 4 years before that. When I first met him we were young and in college, so everyone we knew was drinking, vaping, and smoking weed to some degree, including both of us. Like any typical 19 year old, I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but as I’ve grown older, I definitely don’t drink as much and I haven’t vaped or smoked weed in at least 3-4 years. My husband on the other hand, has switched to ZYNs (because the constant vaping around me gave me headaches), but he still smokes weed. Sometimes it’s 1 time a week, other times it’s like 3 times a day. Depends on the day. Anyway, it was starting to bother me and worry me because I’m now in my residency post medical school and I know how harmful weed can be. Also, before it was just a weed pen and lately it’s been actual weed, so it’s a lot more noticeable on his clothes and breath. I’ve started to take the weed consumption more seriously for a handful of reasons including his fertility, his mental health, his drive to accomplish things, and the least of all, the smell is terrible. We want to have kids before long and I’m worried the weed will affect our ability, especially since I’ve noticed that he’s started to struggle with not being able to get it up after he smokes. I brought this up to him a few times now and he got upset and defensive saying that I never cared about it before and that I already made him quit vaping before we got married (it wasn’t an ultimatum or anything but I did ask) And he said that smoking weed makes him a better person and he’s not addicted at all (he has smoked consistently since age 14). Anyway, am I the asshole for bringing this up and for continuing to talk about it?