VERY LONG!! i am 19F and my best friend is 18F, we are only a few months apart and have grown up going to school together, till 9th grade when she moved to Portland for 4 years, she has moved back now and lives an hour away.

We used to hang out pretty much every weekend and she used to be an amazing friend, so much more caring and attentitive.

Lately when we talk, she only texts me when she is bored or has nobody else to talk to. I would also like to point out that i do not have a car and she does, i pay to ride the bus to go see her and she has never once volunteered to come see me in my town, it has constantly been only me putting in effort to want to hang out or going to see her. Everytime we hang out and i ask to do something, if she doesnt want to do it then we dont get to do it, but if SHE wants to do something and i dont, then i can just sit and wait around for her to be done doing it. Basically its her way or the highway. I have tried to ask to do things but if she doesnt want to do it too then she will tell me to go do it myself when i had specifically asked to do it with her as friends.

This also includes when we are at MY house, so far it has been everytime we hang out; we never get to do what i want to and i grew up knowing that when someone comes to your house and is your guest, you do what they want to do with some compromise if you dont want to or arent comfortable doing that. When we go to my house, i allow my guests to choose what we do given they are my guest and that is the curtious thing to do. I would like to mention that i have tried to talk to her about this.

Another instance that has caused me to choose to drop her as a friend, on my BIRTHDAY i invited my friend and my mom with me to the mall, we went to a movie and then we where going to shop around for a bit and just have fun in general.

Throught the day, my mom needed to get her ring cleaned at the mall and asked us to wait for her, so that was my intention but my friend didnt want to wait and said "your mom can come find us" but i did not want to leave my mom behind because i didnt find that fair at all. MULTIPLE times over the course of MY BIRTHDAY, my friend would wander off or try to drag me with her and leave my mom behind, it was very upsetting and a lot of the time it left me conflicted because i had the urge to follow her and leave my mom but i didnt want to be mean or make my mom upset because if it where me i would have been very hurt if my friends left me behind. I communicated it multiple times that it made me uncomfortable to leave my mom behind but my friend did not care and continually ignored my requests and discomfort.

A week later would be the day i was going to the mall with my friends for my birthday, because the day i went to the mall with my friend and my mom was my actual birthday, so i had planned a second day later in the week for just my friends to come to, and (im going to use names now) Danica- my best friend, wanted to go get a flash tattoo on the day of my birthday day at the mall for my friends, and i had asked her not to because that would take her away from my time and i wanted to spend as much time with everyone as possible, and she had specifically told me that she wouldnt be getting one so she could come to my birthday on time. I believed her.

Fast forward to the day of my birthday at the mall with my friends, i was running a bit late and that meant i wasnt able to pick anyone up yet (my moms friend was driving me and all my friends to the mall) and so Danica texted me and asked if she could go get the flash tattoo, and i told her to not go because there wouldnt be enough time for her to go, wait, and get the tattoo before we went to pick her up; also because she had told me she wouldnt go.

But before i even got to tell her no, she told me she was already on her way. So i uninvited her to the birthday thing at the mall. Later on in the week she was talking to me like nothing had happened and i communicated to her that i no longer wish to be friends with her because she has not been respecting me and has been disregarding my feelings for months now, and if she didnt apologize about it then i dont want to talk to her anymore, but all she said was "okay" and has been texting me like normal since then. its been a month now and she still hasnt apologized.

Am i the asshole for wanting to fully cut her out of my life, or should i try and rekindle the friendship? (sorry this is so long and for any grammatical errors)

TLDR: My best friend has been disrespecting my wants and needs, asking too much of me and not putting in the same effort. She made my own birthday celebration about her and still hasn't apologized. AITAH for wanting to drop her as a friend?