I work at a bar with many different people, including one girl we will call L. L is very well liked by everyone at this job and quite popular with customers too. I have ADHD and Autism so I can be quite talkative to coworkers I have stuff in common with, including a couple of guys in my age range who are our coworkers. L has been a bit short in the past with me in the past and isn't as warm to me as she is to other coworkers, I have seen a visible change in her demeanor whenever I get involved in a conversation.

Recently I was talking with two coworkers to pass the time during an especially slow shift and L was in on this shift, she got very annoyed with me and yelled at me in front of coworkers and customers, ''Seriously do you ever shut up? you are one of the most annoying people I have ever met''. I simply apologised and went to find something to busy myself with and did not speak to them for the rest of the shift. She hasn't spoken about it to me, and the next time I saw her she has simply pretended like t never happened.

Since that day I have made an effort to be less talkative and quiet around L, I do not engage in conversation with her or acknowledge her unless she speaks to me first and usually I will keep it to a minimum, I only speak to her when I absolutely have to. A few weeks ago it was just me and L on the bar and when it got particularly slow she did try to make conversation with me but I just gave her one-word answers and didn't actively ask her questions or talk back to her. A day later on a closing shift, she was giving the rest of our coworkers a lift home, she saw that I was going to the train station to catch a train that wasn't due for another 40 minutes and said that I should just jump in and she will drop me off along with the rest of our coworkers, I politely refused and said that I would hate to put her out and that she would have to go a different direction as to where she was taking our other coworkers (albeit its only another 5-10 minute drive but I would be alone with her in the car and I would rather wait almost an hour in the cold than be around her).

I could see L was visibly surprised and shocked that I refused, and again reiterated that she did not mind but I said I would prefer to wait for the train and said goodbye and went to wait for it.

A few days ago another coworker, Jamie, who was one of the staff in the car that night that she gave a lift home asked to speak to me in private and said that L was very hurt and upset that I refused the lift home and that I would rather wait 40 minutes in the cold and at night than accept a lift from her. He also said that she has noticed the way I go quiet around her and the fact that someone she works with ''actively avoids her, makes her feel very shitty about herself''. I brought up the incident where she yelled at me and called me annoying and that I speak too much, I then replied that I am simply trying to not get on her nerves, and if she doesn't like me when I talk and when I am silent then maybe she simply has a problem with me. Jamie said that she shouldn't have spoken to me the way she did but that my avoiding of her is making her mental health, and that ignoring someone and their attempts to be nice is somehow worse than her verbally abusing someone in front of others.