I [28M] am currently engaged to my [26F] and we are deep in the wedding planning process. Ever since getting engaged though (so for about the past year) we've been in a bit of a stalemate about sex and gender roles within our relationship.

Context:

Essentially, my partner says that she wants a relationship where the male partner essentially has sex as their #1 priority. Not that she wants sex super often, or even has a high libido, but she definitely wants her male partner to value sex above all else, have a high libido, persue it often, etc. She really wants a man who would love to have sex every day of they could, even if she herself doesn't want that.

I'm a little different however. While, to be clear, I do highly value sex and do consider it a high priority, this idea of it being my absolute #1 priority every day just feels weird to me and really rubs me the wrong way.

Situation:

All of what I just mentioned above was sort-of unknown to either of us before and throughout our relationship. It really just didn't come up, and that's probably because functionally it wasn't an issue. We have sex 1-2 times a week and I initiate it about 85%-90% of the time.

However, and argument came up where it was revealed that that's the type of man she wants, and that she refuses to be happy in a relationship that isn't this. For the past year, I've been trying to "meet" this need, but it has lead to so many smaller issues that it got to the point it was too difficult for me to just pretend I wanted sex above all else in my life, when that simply isn't the case.

And so I tried being honest with her by saying I meet her need the vast majority of the time, and I highly value sex, but I can't possibly be fully happy in our relationship if I always feel like I have to put on an act. I'm a very well rounded person, who likes to spend time with friends, hobbies, etc. So this idea that sex is the single most important thing is just a little off to me. What's more is, if I'm being honest, 1-2 times a week is perfect for me and my libido.

After bringing this up, she sort-of lost it, and says that I'm ruining the relationship for her and making us incompatible. She's sort of given me the cold shoulder ever since this discussion took place.

Now, if it remained there that would be one thing, but she has continued to go so far as saying that I duped her, that she hates me, that she regrets ever getting into a relationship with me, and that I've wasted her life by preventing her from being able to find a real man (of which she clearly doesn't consider me). Despite this going on for days, she refuses to walk these things back, doubling down on them whenever pressed. Her reasoning is that I'm being honest, so she deserves to be honest too.

I've been fully committed to this person and so very excited to marry her soon, but I'd be lying if I said this whole thing has given my pause, especially the more recent responses.

I'm I in the wrong here by being too honest? Am I the AH for bringing up the discussion on whether our needs can/can't be met, even if that means we have to have a hard conversation about compatibility?