My husband‘s brother is getting married for the second time. To be clear my husband was my brother-in-law‘s best man during his first marriage. My husband didn’t plan anything for the bachelor party for his first marriage. Since being married to my husband for as long as I have been, I’ve realized plans are not his strong suit. Fast-forward to seven years later. His brother is getting married again. There is a coed bachelor/bachelorette party planned. There was even an Airbnb booked and everyone was supposed to pitch it. I delivered my third baby in January and the bachelorette/bachelorette party took place in March. We had plans leading up to the date, I let my husband know that I wasn’t exactly comfortable, staying in the Airbnb with our children and leaving them with a babysitter all night. We, at the time, had a four-year-old a one and a half year-old and a 2 1/2 month old baby. It was a lot for me, I was a working mom and my husband worked full-time as well and we were both very tired. I asked my husband if he was OK if we didn’t stay at the Airbnb for the night of the bachelor/bachelorette party. He was OK with that plan. So I hired a babysitter to watch our children until midnight that night. Fast forward to us getting to the restaurant that evening, there was quite a full party there all of the bachelor and bachelorette party and a few friends as well. At some point in time, my husband and his brother get up to go to the bathroom. When they come back, my husband’s brother, asks me if it would be OK for my husband to stay for the evening for his bachelor party, as long as this doesn’t make me upset and as long as it doesn’t cause drama. He asked me this in front of the whole wedding party and friends and family. I’m not entirely sure what to say because I know if I say no, it’s going to make me look like a stick in the mud. But my hubby and I had a plan before we arrived. I find out later from my husband that their conversation in the bathroom, my husband told him he didn’t think that he could stay the night. So my brother-in-law comes out and asks me instead, and my husband stares at his plate the entire time that he’s asking me that question . So knowing that, I’ll look like a bitch if I don’t let him stay, I say it’s OK. And at the end of dinner, I say my goodbyes and I head home alone to my three children at home and to pay the babysitter and say good night. Am I the asshole for being upset with my husband for changing the plan at the last minute and not just telling his brother that we already had a plan in place when we came to dinner.? He says I should understand it was a once in a life time opportunity for his brother.

FYI. Bachelor party was in OKC and our home town was an hour and 45 away. And my Husband had NO input on plans with this party. He just showed up.